Both worlds are like dreams

Xue Huang could tell that his voice had become hoarse and his breath seemed a little weak. She couldn't help but stretch out her hand to open the door, but controlled herself and pulled it back.

"Prince Gu," Yun Qing advised, "It's late at night and the dew is heavy. If you keep waiting here, you will get sick, and the princess doesn't want to see you like this. Or you can rest in the mansion first and come to see the princess tomorrow."

Xue Huang couldn't see Gu Qinglan's expression, but his voice was firm and unusual, "I know she is here. She can't hide from me forever. If she really doesn't want to see me forever, then I will wait for her here forever."

Yun Qing's voice did not sound again. Perhaps she felt that she could not persuade Gu Qinglan, so she had to find another way.

Xue Huang stood at the door, listening to the footsteps approaching, and then saw light coming in through the gap.

Gu Qinglan's voice sounded outside the door, "I know you are here."

Xue Huang didn't say anything.

"This lantern was given to me when you left three years ago. Forgive me for not discovering what you hid inside until now." Gu Qinglan opened a note and saw the words on it. He smiled slightly: "I have been hanging this lantern well above the bed until today when I knocked it to the ground and saw the note you put under the lamp holder. I'm sorry, I should have discovered it earlier."

That lantern was won by Gu Qinglan at the market three years ago when she was taking her shopping by shooting arrows.

She had kept it hanging on the head of her bed until she left three years ago, when she gave it to Gu Qinglan.

But she hid a note inside, which read: Brother Qinglan, when we meet again, I want to be your wife.

They had agreed to meet at Qinghai Lake, and she hoped that when they met again, they would never be separated again.

But fate played a trick on them, and their story did not go as she expected.

"Xue Huang," Gu Qinglan knocked on the door, trying to suppress the grief in his heart, "Can you please open the door? At least... give me an explanation. Tell me, why?"

Xue Huang's eyes were already filled with tears at this time. She held onto the door frame, her fingers trembling slightly.

At this moment, she suddenly felt sleepy and closed her eyes. When she opened her eyes again, she was already in the world of gems.

The young man looked at her, feeling very disappointed but helpless: "If you can't face it, why did you make this choice in the first place?"

"Nonsense! Can I just watch him die?"

"It's no use hiding from him all the time. You have to meet him eventually."

"I'm afraid of hurting him."

"You hiding from me is also a kind of harm." The young man sighed. "Believe it or not, Gu Qinglan will keep waiting until he gets your answer."

Xue Huang didn't say anything, she was still hesitating.

"Go ahead." The boy said. "You are the only one who can give him a reason to give up on you."

Xue Huang opened her eyes and found herself still standing in front of the door, but suddenly there was a strange noise outside the door, and it was Gu Qinglan's body leaning against the door.

He seemed to be unable to stand steadily, and his voice became a little weak, "Xue Huang..."

Xue Huang was startled, thinking that his heart-eating poison had attacked again, and she immediately opened the door without caring about anything else.

Gu Qinglan leaned over and hugged her.

"Are you okay?" Xue Huang asked worriedly. "I'll take you to find Lin Yu."

Gu Qinglan just hugged her and asked, "Why don't you see me?"

Xue Huang was afraid that being too close to him would trigger the poison, so she wanted to push him away, "Let me go first."

Gu Qinglan hugged her tighter, "You said you would be my wife, why... why... did you break your promise?"

"I'm sorry." Xue Huang couldn't control her tears and they soaked Gu Qinglan's clothes drop by drop.

"Is it because of me?"

Xue Huang did not answer, but asked: "Do you still remember what I said to you in the Star Observatory?"

Gu Qinglan's mouth was full of bitterness, "So you have made your choice from that moment on." He finally understood why she took him to walk through the streets and alleys that day, to every place they had been to before. Why that day, she seemed to have changed into a different person, and even chose a red dress. Why that day, she suddenly mentioned the Tiangan Sword.

She wanted him to give up himself between Shengshi and her, and even thought of an excuse for him.

"You promised me that you would work hard to realize our wishes, so I will do this in my own way."

"You don't have to lie to me." Gu Qinglan said. "It was Mo Yunchen who planted the Heart-Eating Gu on me, so you chose him, right?"

"no."

"Why are you so stupid?"

"Can you please let me go first?" Xue Huang wiped away her tears, "Let's talk slowly."

Gu Qinglan gently let her go, looked at her red eyes, and caressed her eyes distressedly. "Come with me to see the emperor."

Xue Huang held his cold hand and smiled faintly, "This matter has been decided, and it concerns the marriage between the two countries. How can it be changed at will?"

"There must be a way." Gu Qinglan frowned, "You promised me that you would not compromise." He was not afraid of the imperial edict, nor was he afraid of difficulties. He was only afraid that Xue Huang would give up first.

"I'm sorry, Brother Qinglan," Xuehuang withdrew her hand, "I have made up my mind and I won't change it." She walked to the dressing table and took out a box.

"What is this?" Gu Qinglan asked.

Xue Huang opened the box, and inside was the hairpin that Gu Qinglan had given her, as well as the jade bracelet and the jade pendant that they had pledged their love under the Moon Goddess Tree. Everything in the past came to her mind vividly. Xue Huang lowered her head and dared not look him in the eye, holding back tears as she said, "Whether it's the Moon Goddess Tree or the Yue Lao Temple, the vows between you and me are...forget it!"

Gu Qinglan looked at her in disbelief, "What did you say?!"

"I'll give this back to you. We are even now."

Gu Qinglan grabbed her hand, and his heart felt like thousands of needles piercing through it. His voice was trembling a little, "You said...you said you wanted to make peace with me?"

Xue Huang didn't say anything.

Gu Qinglan gave a bitter smile, full of sadness and disbelief, "If you return this to me, will we really be even? My heart is with you, how are you going to give it back to me?"

Xue Huang's tears dripped onto his hands, the scalding temperature just like her burning heart at the moment.

She didn't understand what love was. She didn't understand why Hua Yu said she would give up everything for someone she loved. She also didn't understand why Hua Yu would give up her talent in swordsmanship in order to be with him.

It was not until she met Gu Qinglan that she knew what love was.

To like someone means that you want to see him all the time. If you can’t see him, you can’t help wondering what he is doing. When you see him, you can’t help but feel happy.

When you like someone, you will be happy when he is happy, and you will be sad when he is hurt.

To like someone means to want to share all the most precious things with him, to want to do all the fun things with him, and to want to be with him all the time, without being apart for a lifetime.

Gu Qinglan was the person she liked very much. She liked his smile, his gentleness like water, his elegance and wisdom, the way he treated others with aloofness but close to her, and the way he blushed and was shy.

She likes all of his looks.

She wanted to be his wife and be with him forever.

But compared to his safety, none of this matters. She just hopes that Gu Qinglan can live well.

Gu Qinglan wiped away her tears, "You can't fool me at all. Even if you found so many excuses for me, in the end you still had to marry someone else to save me."

Xue Huang's heart was broken, she had no way to tell him that she didn't care about him. She couldn't lie to herself or Gu Qinglan.

"That day in the Observatory, I talked to you a lot. These are the last words I want to say to you today. I hope you can always remember them in your heart."

"I remember everything you said. But I also said that I will never let you down."

"I didn't finish my words at that time." Xue Huang looked up at him, "I said, no matter what happens in the future, we are all working towards the same goal. This is our belief, just like our hearts will always be together, even if... we can't be together."

Gu Qinglan shook his head, "I didn't promise you, this doesn't count!"

"Brother Qinglan," Xue Huang sighed, "I have made up my mind. No matter what you say, I will not change my mind. Go back. Remember my words well in your heart. I look forward to the prosperous world that you and I wish for."

Gu Qinglan let go of her hand, his expression showing determination and firmness, "This is my own life, you can't decide life or death for me!" After he finished speaking, he took out a medicine bottle from his waist. It was the one that Xue Huang asked Su Linjin to pass on to Lin Yu, but he threw it away without even looking at it.

Xue Huang hurriedly grabbed his wrist and looked at him with a frown, "What are you going to do?"

"I said before, I would rather die than watch you compromise for me. How can the heartbreak of the heart-eating poison compare to the pain of watching you marry someone else for me? Since both are worse than death, I will make the choice myself!"

"Okay!" Xue Huang shook off his hand with tears in her eyes. "If you don't care about the people of Beiling living in poverty, don't care about the Fifth Prince being alone, don't care about the old cases that have not been redressed, don't care about your grandfather's lonely life, and don't care about our past vision, if you don't care about anything, you can choose to die! Then I will accompany you!" After Xue Huang finished speaking, she pulled out the Qingshuang from her waist and placed it across her neck.

"No!" Gu Qinglan stretched out his hand to grasp the sword, and the sharp blade immediately cut his palm, but he didn't care at all. "No!"

"If you die," Xue Huang looked at him firmly, "I won't live alone!"

Gu Qinglan's tears fell to the ground, and his tearful eyes showed helplessness and despair. He thoroughly understood how helpless and sad Xue Huang's words "How can I have the best of both worlds, not disappointing the Tathagata and not disappointing you" made him feel.

The prosperous times are still gone, but the one I love has been betrayed.

At this moment, Gu Qinglan was as fragile as a child.

He didn't say anything, slowly loosened his hand, and walked away slowly, step by step, like a puppet that had lost its soul.

The autumn moonlight fell on him, and his back looked extremely desolate.