Yi Xin as a concubine

Xin Baoer closed her eyes, which were strangely dry and painful, but without a single tear.

"Go ahead, maybe you can give me a heads up."

Lianrong didn't know what to remind her, but seeing that the girl was so determined, she didn't dare to disobey, so she had to speak tremblingly.

"Perhaps because of this fate, I paid more attention to her afterwards and often went to the courtyard where she lived. One time, she saw me holding some broken vegetable leaves and gave me some snacks. She also told me to go find her when I was hungry."

Having said this, Lianrong's mood completely dropped, her voice became even lower, and she sobbed from time to time.

"After that, she didn't think about running away. With her beauty, she was admitted into the harem as expected. However, the emperor had too many women, and she didn't take the initiative to flatter and curry favor, so she was soon forgotten."

"It was probably about two or three months after she entered the harem that I met a slave who was bullied. From then on, I came to serve her. The two of us lived together in an inconspicuous little courtyard. But the good days lasted less than a month, and my sister's nightmare came."

"Young lady, you can't imagine the disgusting things in this palace. There are some old and ugly palace maids who have no hope of leaving the palace, so they stir up trouble in the palace. They introduce those gradually forgotten women to the guards on duty. Those who volunteer are fine, but for those who don't cooperate like my sister, they will do everything they can to force them to submit. If coercion and inducement don't work, they will use those disgusting things."

"My sister and I hid here and there, tried every possible means, but we only managed to hold on for half a month. My sister was still tricked. I was dragged by a few bad women and could only watch my sister being bullied."

"But this is not the worst. After the first time, I will do it again, and then three times, four times, and five times. Seeing that sister would rub her white and tender skin red and even with blood every time, I wanted to pick up a knife and chop those beasts, but I was too young and couldn't protect my sister at all. I almost... almost got beaten to death."

Lianrong couldn't continue speaking and was crying out of breath. Xin Baoer's gray eyes also revealed deep sadness, but no one knew whether it was because of her own bleak future or for Lianrong's sister.

After a long pause, Lianrong finally stopped crying and continued to speak with sobs.

"After that, my sister stopped resisting and even learned to negotiate. But she would always send the maid away. Since then, we have never been hungry. Moreover, my sister always gave me most of the food, saying that she wanted to make me fat."

"I didn't understand at that time. When I saw her smiling, I thought she was happy, so she gave me food and I ate it. Every time she saw that I ate cleanly, she would gently wipe my mouth."

Lianrong wanted to cry again, and she took several deep breaths before she suppressed her emotions that were about to collapse.

"It was about half a year ago that I realized something was wrong with my sister. She was often in a daze, her mood was sometimes good and sometimes bad, and she often had new wounds on her wrists and arms. I was terrified, but every time I asked her, she said she didn't know how those wounds came about. This situation lasted for a few months, and suddenly she started hurting people."

"After she injured several men in succession, the courtyard where we lived finally returned to peace, but life returned to the hard times before, even harder than before. We had no idea where to get food. At that time, I was already very fat and had a big appetite, and I often woke up from hunger at night."

As if she remembered something terrible, Lianrong's face was filled with anxiety and her voice was trembling.

"I saw... that sister who had always been smiling gently, suddenly turned ferocious. The scissors that she usually used to cut and mend clothes stabbed into a man's chest without any warning, and then pulled them out without hesitation. The smell of blood spread throughout the courtyard in the dark night, but she didn't stop. She stabbed and pulled out again and again. I was so scared that I stood at the door and dared not move."

Lianrong could no longer sit on the stool. She hugged her knees with both hands and curled up on the footstool beside Xin Baoer's bed, her shoulders shaking slightly, as if she saw the tragic and horrible scene again.

"By the time I came to my senses and ran in to try to stop it, it was too late. The bloody scissors were deeply stuck in my sister's chest. She held the handles tightly with both hands, so hard that the veins on the back of her hands were bulging."

When Xin Baoer imagined the scene at that time, she couldn't help but feel a chill down her spine. How much hatred did this person have that he didn't even leave any room for her.

She remembered that when she chose to end her life in her previous life, she stole a bottle of fine wine that her father had treasured, and drank until she was eight or nine points drunk, leaving only one or two points of clarity, for fear that she would crawl to the ground but had no courage.

She shook her head, putting aside those terrible and long-ago things, and wanted to stop Lianrong from continuing, but the little girl seemed to want to talk more at this moment. She wiped her tears with the back of her hand and continued talking.

"Perhaps it was the loss of blood that gave her a brief moment of clarity. When she saw me running in, she smiled gently. Her face was covered in blood, but her eyes were so bright and gentle, just like when we first met in Chuxiu Palace."

"My sister used the last bit of her life force to smile and tell me to remember to eat more and gain weight, so that I would be safe."

"Miss, I didn't know until then that my sister let those beasts get close to her because of me, so that I could gain weight and live longer."

"She said that we can't live without each other. She can't go on like this, but she wants me to live and live well. Wuwu...wuwu..."

Lianrong finally stopped crying, but she was still speaking intermittently.

"She left with a smile on her face. Those nasty old women wanted to take the scissors out of her hand, but they couldn't do it. Haha, my sister is very powerful. They couldn't do it. They didn't dare to destroy my sister's body because her eyes were not closed. She couldn't close her eyes. Girl, my sister was unwilling to accept this! They were afraid, do you know? They were afraid of retribution. Humph! Why didn't they scare them to death? Woo... Woo..."

Lianrong probably didn't know what to say at this moment. She just kept saying how unwilling she was, how good her sister was to her, and how those people were beasts who deserved to die.

Xin Baoer's withered heart was slightly hurt by Lianrong's venting. Such a well-rounded and lovely little girl, who followed her eating and drinking heartlessly every day, with a positive and sunny smile in her eyes, but it turned out that there was such a great sadness hidden inside. If it were her, she would have collapsed long ago!

Looking at the little girl who fell asleep tired after venting her anger, Xin Baoer covered her round little body with a blanket, sighed, put on a piece of clothing, walked carefully to the couch by the window and sat down, looking at the crescent moon above her head, tears streaming down her face unknowingly.

She missed home, missed everyone in the Xin family, missed the old man of the Xin family, the father who might not be her biological father, the man who always held her in the palm of his hand, missed the eldest lady, the woman who was nominally her mother, with a quick temper, but who was worried sick about her marriage, missed her sisters, missed her brothers, missed Mother Lin, missed the orchid grass, wanted to drink the scented tea at Taoyuan Tea House, and eat the freshly baked snacks there.

But she just realized today that her expectations were just a joke, and all her efforts and cautiousness were just self-deception. She can't go back.

That is a warm home for her!

A home that cures social phobia and anxiety!

How come I can never go back?

What should she do? She didn’t seem to have the courage to be as resolute as Sister Lianrong. After having a close brush with death, she had used up all her courage and didn’t have the courage to do it again.

What should she do?

The bright moon was silent, the night wind was cold, the shadows of the trees were dancing, and no one could answer her.

The original owner had followed her mother's will and was determined to be a concubine. After she traveled through time, she didn't think there was anything wrong with it. Since it was impossible to have a monogamous marriage here, there was nothing wrong with just staying in the backyard and being an insignificant concubine who posed no threat to anyone.

But she didn't want to be the emperor's concubine, and she didn't want to be chosen by those lecherous officials.

I don’t know how long I cried, what was going on in my head, or when I fell asleep in a daze.