Quick Wear: A Newbie Goes to Pet Her Husband

I am Gao Zixiang, I am reborn!

Reborn in a world where I was not ruined by Lin Qingyan, or rather, she had not had the chance to ruin me yet.

Great, I have a chance to live again.

I thought to myself that all this was a bit ridiculous. I wasn’t sure if this was a rebirth or a dream. I recalled that Lin Qingyan would drown today, and I wanted to use this incident to confirm my thoughts.

She did drown, but I still don't understand whether this was a rebirth or a dream.

Because she has changed. She is not as aggressive, clumsy and selfish as I remembered her to be.

She is smart and graceful. She trains hard and is not the one who relied on the help of others to debut as we remember.

She sacrificed herself for others and even gave up her own debut for the sake of her good friend.

I admit that when I first approached her, I was just curious about why she had changed.

Gradually, I was attracted to her, and I seemed to understand that maybe my feelings for her before were not likes or love, but obsession, because of her sudden appearance during the days of hunger.

I wanted to let go of the hatred in that bizarre and unreliable memory, love her deeply, and live happily with her, but every time I had such a thought, my heart began to ache.

It reminds me all the time that it wasn't just some ridiculous memory, it was everything I had experienced personally, and she had destroyed me.

Looking at her unbridled smile and her loving eyes looking at me, I could only spend night after night in a mixture of love and hate.

Every time I slept with her, I hid a knife under my pillow, thinking of ending these painful days while she was sleeping. But I would think of everything she had done for me. She loved me so sincerely, and I couldn't do that.

I knew I was sick, even though she had never been bad to me, cared about my emotions, my preferences, my dreams, and even gave me everything I wanted.

But this is too dreamy, so dreamy that I still can't believe her. Her actions in her previous life have affected me so deeply.

I went to see a psychologist secretly without telling her. I wanted to love her completely and I didn't want that memory to torment me anymore.

But it was completely ineffective. The psychologist said my personality was distorted.

Since my obsession is so strong, please don't let me realize that she has done anything wrong to me.

Even the smallest thing and that knife would end her life.

For a period of time afterwards, she seemed to have noticed something, and there was always some emotion in her eyes when she looked at me that I couldn't understand.

I panicked. I was afraid that she would know my secret, that she would despise me for being sick and leave me, that she would feel that she could not get her complete love...

I was waiting for her to question me, but she didn't. Instead, she became even nicer to me and sought my advice on everything she did.

Why is she so good? If she weren't so good, I wouldn't have the heart to kill her.

I couldn't bear the split emotions, so I started to hurt myself! I was afraid of hurting her, so I chose to hurt myself.

Every time hatred takes over my mind, I pick up a knife and cut myself.

When I was intimate with her that day, she discovered my wound which had not yet healed, and she was very angry.

I have never seen her angry in all these years. It scared me. She didn't yell or scream, but just had a blank expression on her face and ignored me for five days.

Even when I took off all my clothes and stood in front of her, she remained indifferent, and there were flashes of emotions in her eyes that I couldn't understand.

I was scared, afraid that she didn't want me, and started to panic again.

But she is like a ray of light, illuminating me, a person living in darkness.

I have given up on myself. When we were together, she was greedy for my body, but now it's useless for me to seduce her. I'm waiting for her to abandon me.

But she suddenly got better, and later I realized that the emotion in her eyes that I couldn't understand was heartache.

She didn't say much, but in the middle of the night, in the dark room, on that large bed, she pitied me and loved me over and over again.

The moonlight spread throughout the room, illuminating my heart, and I felt as if I had recovered from my illness, as if I had been cured by her.

She is no longer angry. We have been in love for decades. She still spoils me as always. She tolerates my temper and comforts me when I am upset. I can't find anyone better than her.

One day I felt that my life was coming to an end, but I was less than 60, I was still very young, and I couldn't bear to leave her.

Dark thoughts overcame my reason again, and the knife appeared beside me again. I realized that my illness had not been cured at all, but I had learned to hide it in front of the doctor.

This virus secretly tortured me, a patient who was already covered in bruises, and tore apart my sanity in my brain.

It won, memory won, and I lost, completely!

The knife was stuck on my lower back, covered by my clothes.

She seemed to have telepathic connection with me and found me. Her eyes flickered and tears of reluctance flowed down her face.

I had a blank expression on my face, because in my eyes at that moment she was the one who ruined me, the one who was so selfish that she ruined my life for herself!

I hated her! At the same time, I blamed her, why did she change, why didn't she treat me as badly as before, why did she treat me well, did she change her way to play with me wantonly.

As if he had lost his mind, he was darkly distorting the love she had for him.

I always felt that she pretended to love me, and then waited until I was dying to cruelly tell me that she had been playing with me all these years.

She doesn't like me, she doesn't love me!

Just as I was about to take out the knife behind me and kill her before my life ended.

She cried and told me that she had no regrets and that she loved me deeply!

What does she not regret, what does she know?

After saying that, she searched for something on my body, and she found it! The knife! She pulled it out and stabbed herself fiercely.

At that moment I understood that she didn't regret anything. She didn't regret liking me and falling in love with me. She had known for a long time that I was sick, and she had also known for a long time that my love for her contained murderous intent.

I regret it! I shouldn't have hurt a girl who treated me wholeheartedly like this, just for that ridiculous memory!

Even if I was ruined by her, she has always loved me deeply, all my life!

I hurriedly grabbed her hand, changed the direction of the dagger, and stabbed myself.

Consider it as atonement for her sins. The way she died was the same as in her memory, except that this time she no longer died with resentment and unwillingness, but with relief.

She hugged me in panic, crying and asking me loudly why.

I wanted to raise my hand and wipe away her tears.

I want to tell her, stop crying, silly girl.

I want to tell her that I love her too.

I think......

But the pain made me unable to speak. I opened my mouth but no sound came out, so I gave in.

Actually, I was reluctant this time and didn't tell her that I loved her deeply.

I tried my best but couldn't say anything and could only shed tears of regret.

I think I fell in love with her a long time ago?

The love at that time was so selfless, so pure, and without any hatred.

If I could, I would like to do it again.

This time, it’s my turn to pamper her!