Siheyuan, integrating everything, cultivating the city

"Why are you doing this?" Li Xiangqian asked in a low voice, with a hint of helplessness in his tone. He wanted to escape from this oppressive air, but his feet seemed to be fixed by some invisible force.

Jia Zhang frowned slightly, as if trying to figure out the meaning of Li Xiangqian's words. She did not answer immediately, but sighed softly, as if to release all the backlog of these years. "I know there are many things you don't want to face. I can understand your past, but you can't live in the shadow of the past forever." Her voice was a little hoarse, but still full of determination, "If you really care about me, you should tell me everything, at least let us both know where we stand."

Li Xiangqian was shocked. This sentence made his heart fluctuate violently again. Every time he heard Jia Zhang say these words, a complex emotion would surge in his heart, a contradiction of wanting to escape but being unable to escape. He understood that Jia Zhang's words were not all reproach, but more of an expectation, a hope that she had never given up.

However, Li Xiangqian knew that he could not give her such a response. He closed his eyes and remained motionless for a long time. Jia Zhangshi did not rush to urge him, but just stood quietly in front of him, with the determination and persistence in her eyes, as if pushing him to a place where he could not turn back.

"I can't say." Li Xiangqian's voice was so weak that it was almost inaudible. "There are some things I can never say."

"You're running away again." Jia Zhang's tone became cold, like disappointment, but also with a kind of helpless fatigue, "Don't you really understand? Running away can only make things worse, Li Xiangqian, what have you been running away from in your life? You can escape this time, but what about the next time? One day, you will understand that true courage lies in facing yourself."

"I..." Li Xiangqian opened his mouth, wanting to refute, but found that he couldn't say anything. The suppressed pain in his heart almost suffocated him. He had never been so deeply aware of what he was avoiding in all his escapes.

Seeing that he remained silent, Jia Zhang finally realized that no matter how she pressed him, Li Xiangqian could not give her the answer she expected. She paused for a moment, then turned around and said in a calm voice, "If you don't want to face it, then stay like this forever, Li Xiangqian. I can only tell you that escaping will never make you stronger, it will only make you more and more lost."

Li Xiangqian stood there, watching her back gradually go away, the pain in his heart became more and more intense. He lowered his head, staring at the ground, and fell into deep thought. The words that Jia Zhang said pierced into the deepest part of his heart like a knife. Those facts that had nowhere to escape had now become impossible to ignore.

He suddenly had the urge to burst into tears, but he held it back. Everything in front of him was so blurry, like a long dream that he couldn't wake up from or recover from.

Li Xiangqian stood there, staring at Jia Zhang's receding figure, feeling lost. His hand was still tightly holding the shopping bag, and the items in the bag seemed meaningless to him at this moment. Jia Zhang's words were like a sharp knife, ruthlessly cutting through his heart. He knew clearly what he had been avoiding, but the consequences of all this seemed so clear and unavoidable in her eyes.

He was about to turn around and leave, looking for a place to calm down, but suddenly Jia Zhang's voice came from behind: "Li Xiangqian!"

She didn't shout very loudly, but her voice was firm and threatening. Li Xiangqian stopped walking, his heartbeat accelerated unconsciously, and a sense of nervousness and uneasiness flashed through his mind.

"How long do you want to hide?" Jia Zhang's voice came from behind him, with a hint of repressed emotion, as if she was ready to stir up a storm. "Do you think you can hide forever, say nothing, do nothing, and let everyone be at your mercy? Tell me, Li Xiangqian, what do you want?"

Li Xiangqian felt annoyed. He turned around and almost unconsciously wanted to explain: "I don't want anything. I'm just doing what I should do."

Jia Zhang's face darkened instantly, and her eyes were fixed on Li Xiangqian's face. The anger and dissatisfaction in her eyes were almost unconcealable, which made Li Xiangqian speechless. She spoke slowly, and her tone revealed a calm but ruthless determination: "Do you know what you owe me, Li Xiangqian? You always use silence and avoidance to cover up. Tell me, how are you going to escape today?"

Li Xiangqian's throat was dry, and he could hardly answer her. Jia Zhang in front of him seemed to have become a completely different person. Her attitude was no longer that of gentle concern, but became serious and oppressive. Li Xiangqian suddenly felt like he was backed into a corner. The air around him seemed to become heavy in an instant, and every breath made him feel depressed.

"What do you want?" Li Xiangqian finally spoke in a low and hoarse voice. He knew that if he didn't answer this question, he would never be able to get rid of the pressure brought by Jia Zhang.

Jia Zhang's eyes did not leave Li Xiangqian. Her lips moved slightly and she said slowly, "You know, I have never been a person who likes to rely on others. But since you are standing here, tell me, who are you doing these things for? Is it for yourself, or for the expectations of others? Or is it to escape from something?"

Every word she said seemed to pass through Li Xiangqian's heart. He felt as if countless sharp needles were piercing his chest, and the pain was almost unbearable. He subconsciously took two steps back, his eyes flickering, but he couldn't find a suitable reason to refute.

Jia Zhang looked at him coldly, and suddenly changed her tone: "Since you don't want to say it, since you can't face your past, let me tell you what you owe me."

Li Xiangqian's heart sank involuntarily and his steps stopped again unconsciously.

Jia Zhang's gaze pierced through Li Xiangqian's like a knife. She slowly approached with an unprecedented firmness in her tone: "Li Xiangqian, I know there are some things you have never told me, but this is not a topic you can always avoid. Who do you think I am? Do you think I will always wait for you and tolerate your continued escape? No! You are no longer the person who can always remain calm in front of me, and you are no longer the person who always stands up to protect me at critical moments."

Li Xiangqian felt a sudden pang of bitterness in his heart as he listened to her words. He almost forgot how long he had been standing here. Every word from Jia Zhang mercilessly pierced the pain and guilt that had always existed in his heart. He lowered his head, not daring to look directly into her eyes, as if he had an inexplicable sense of shame that made him unable to face it.