Siheyuan, integrating everything, cultivating the city
Chapter 1239: Stepping Out of the Past
Qin Huairu looked into Li Xiangqian's eyes, as if he wanted to find some kind of answer from him. However, his heart was full of contradictions and uneasiness.
"I don't know." Qin Huairu whispered, with a hint of confusion in her tone, "I only know that I don't want to see him suffer any more. I hope he can live a good life and let go of the past."
Li Xiangqian was silent for a moment, his eyes gradually becoming firm. He took a step closer, his voice low but full of power: "It takes courage to let go of the past. The same goes for you, Qin Huairu. You can give him courage, but you also need to give yourself courage to face everything."
Qin Huairu was slightly stunned, as if she felt some kind of unprecedented power from Li Xiangqian's words. She raised her head and looked at Li Xiangqian, and a glimmer of hope gradually surged in her heart - perhaps there really was a way for them to walk out of the shadow of the past.
Li Xiangqian knew that this process would be a difficult experience for each of them, but he believed that Qin Huairu and Xu Damao would eventually be able to move on from the past and embrace their future.
Li Xiangqian stood there, staring at Qin Huairu in silence, with no trace of emotion in his eyes. He did not respond to her words as Qin Huairu expected, but turned away, his eyes gradually looking away, as if he was no longer looking at her.
Qin Huairu felt a sense of loss she had never felt before. She opened her mouth, as if she wanted to say something, but the words stopped. Her heart beat faster and faster, and she could almost hear the sound of her own rapid beating due to nervousness. She thought that Li Xiangqian would understand her difficulties and perhaps sympathize with her helplessness. But Li Xiangqian in front of her seemed no longer willing to have any extra communication with her.
"Li Xiangqian, you..." Qin Huairu spoke with difficulty, her voice a little hoarse. She knew very well that she seemed to have done something wrong, perhaps just an inappropriate request, or perhaps she was too dependent on Li Xiangqian.
Li Xiangqian finally turned around, his eyes no longer had that calm depth, but instead were filled with a hint of indifference and confusion.
"What do you want me to do?" He asked calmly, his tone calm but without a trace of warmth. "You said you didn't want me to tell anyone about Xu Damao. You said you didn't want him to get hurt again. But have you ever thought that what you are doing now is continuing to indulge him?"
Qin Huairu was stunned. She felt a strong dissatisfaction from Li Xiangqian's tone, or even some kind of accusation.
"I just..." She tried to explain, but her voice seemed to lose strength, and she paused before she finished speaking. Her heart began to beat violently, and she felt an inexplicable sense of oppression that made her a little breathless.
Li Xiangqian did not wait for her answer, but continued coldly: "Xu Damao is no longer that simple man. He has his own responsibilities and his own problems. If you keep letting him escape, sooner or later, he will not be able to save himself. And I can no longer cover up for him."
These words pierced Qin Huairu's heart like a sharp knife, causing her to tremble. She wanted to defend herself, but she didn't know how to start.
Li Xiangqian looked at her, his expression a little blurry, as if his emotions and reason were colliding fiercely. "You have been extremely tolerant of Xu Damao, but you have never thought about whether you need to let go of something." He paused, "Only by letting go of your unnecessary worries and unrealistic expectations can you truly help him, and even yourself."
Qin Huairu was filled with grief. She had been defending Xu Damao, thinking that as long as she was patient and tolerant, she could change him and save him. But Li Xiangqian's words reminded her that perhaps she herself had fallen into a misunderstanding.
"You don't understand." Qin Huairu whispered, his eyes dodging, "You don't understand how much pain he is in. No one can understand his unspeakable pain."
Li Xiangqian looked at her quietly, without a trace of hesitation in his heart. It was not that he did not understand, but he knew that understanding was not the key to the problem. The problem was that Xu Damao needed to face it instead of avoiding it.
"I understand him." Li Xiangqian finally spoke, his tone calm but also revealed a hint of firmness, "But I don't want you to continue sacrificing yourself for him. If you keep going like this, sooner or later you will lose yourself."
Qin Huairu felt a sharp pain, as if a cold feeling of powerlessness swept over her. She couldn't help but close her eyes, as if she wanted to avoid Li Xiangqian's gaze, his deep insight.
She had thought that everything she did was for Xu Damao's good and for his future. However, when Li Xiangqian punctured her fantasy with such calm words, she realized that she had never really seen it all clearly.
"Then what do you think I should do?" Qin Huairu's voice was weak, as if a fragile string was trembling. "Do you want me to let go?"
Li Xiangqian was silent for a moment, then suddenly walked towards her. The woman in front of him lowered her head, as if she had given up struggling. Li Xiangqian stood in front of her, without saying anything else, but just sighed softly.
"I don't want you to sacrifice yourself for others anymore." He finally spoke, his voice becoming softer. "If you really want Xu Damao to get better, the best way is to let him face everything and solve those problems by himself."
Qin Huairu raised her head, with a trace of confusion in her eyes. She had never thought that Li Xiangqian's insistence was actually persuading her to let go. Letting go was not only letting go of Xu Damao, but also letting go of her own unrealistic expectations.
"Let go?" Qin Huairu repeated the word in a low voice to herself, as if she was feeling its weight. She didn't know if she could do this. All her efforts and persistence were for Xu Damao, for the deep feelings between them.
However, Li Xiangqian's words made her begin to question whether she was really doing this for Xu Damao's good, whether she had ever really considered herself, or whether she was just indulging in her own fantasies and forcing others to bear her expectations.
Her mood suddenly became heavy, as if an invisible mountain was pressing on her chest, making it difficult for her to breathe. She was suddenly stunned and lost her direction.
Li Xiangqian sighed softly, knowing that it was not easy for her to understand these principles. After all, emotional entanglements were far more complicated than reason.
"I'm not asking you to give up completely." Li Xiangqian looked into her eyes, his tone full of unquestionable firmness, "I hope you can learn to let go, learn to let go of yourself, and let go of him. Only in this way will you find that real change often comes from letting go."
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