Lima syndrome

"Even if you run to the ends of the earth, I will find you."

Bai Zhiyan didn't say anything. He couldn't say anything now. Even if the cold white snow buried him on the spot, he didn't want to resist at all.

The snow was getting heavier. After Bai Jitai calmed down, he saw Bai Zhiyan still walking barefoot in the snow. He closed his lips and said nothing. He picked him up and walked into the house with ease.

Warmth enveloped Bai Zhiyan again, and his heart gradually calmed down.

He just lost control of his emotions again.

Thinking back to when he lost control of himself like this, when he saw Kim Nam-hyun being beaten by Cha Kyung-chan, he thought he would never lose control of his emotions like this again, but he overestimated himself.

Bai Jitai put him back on the sofa and gently applied a warm towel to his red and frozen feet. Bai Zhiyan lowered his head slightly and looked at the tall man who was kneeling in front of him and holding his feet, with grief and hatred intertwined in his heart.

"Bai Jitai."

Hearing Bai Zhiyan calling him, Bai Jitai raised his head and looked at him, "What's wrong?"

"Do you think it would be more appropriate for me to call you cousin from now on?"

His voice was still a little trembling, but Bai Jitai couldn't help but hear the sarcasm in his words.

"No need, just do it like usual..." Bai Jitai hesitated for a moment, then avoided his sight and lowered his head to continue wiping his feet.

"You can call me by my name."

His voice sounded a little suppressed. Perhaps this would be the most compromising thing Bai Jitai had ever done in his life, Bai Zhiyan thought with some amusement.

"I really want to ask you." He grabbed Bai Jitai's hand that was still holding his ankle, "Did you treat me like that before because I'm Bai Zhengren's son and you were worried that I, a person who has no blood relationship with you, would take away everything he gave you?"

Bai Jitai didn't say anything. Bai Zhiyan was right. Because he had no feelings for Bai Zhengren, he also felt disgust towards the illegitimate son he found.

Until now, he didn't know when he stopped hating Bai Zhiyan. Maybe it was because he ate the kelp soup that didn't belong to him on his birthday? Or maybe it was because he heard the "I love you" that didn't belong to him?

Maybe Bai Zhiyan was right, he really lacked love, so he wanted to keep everyone or things that could make him feel loved.

When he was a child, his relationship with Bai Jiying was very ordinary. They hardly spoke to each other except for daily greetings. He had seen how classmates and relatives with brothers and sisters got along with each other, and the atmosphere was completely different from that in the Bai family.

He thought he had long forgotten the feelings he had envied when he was a child, until Bai Zhiyan appeared. He found that he could also have his own family, even if he always went against him and always made him angry, but it didn't matter, he would reshape him into what he wanted little by little.

But the prerequisite is that he knows that he has no blood relationship with him, but now it is no longer possible.

After knowing that he really had the same blood as himself flowing in his body, he felt excited and a little panicked at the same time. If Bai Zhiyan was really his younger brother, could he still continue to use force and intimidation to deal with him?

Maybe he shouldn't have told the truth so quickly, but he knew that Bai Zhiyan was also a person who lacked love. Shouldn't he be happy that he still had a family member with the same blood as him in this world?

"When you returned to the Bai family, I was indeed worried. I was worried that the things that were within my reach would be taken away by you, and I was worried that the business that I had worked so hard to build over the years would become your wedding dress. But that won't happen anymore."

He held his hand and looked into Bai Zhiyan's eyes, "What's mine is yours. You are my brother. I will make sure you live a life of ease and comfort."

"No, Bai Jita, that's not what I wanted to say." Bai Zhiyan did not pull his hand away but instead bent down slightly, got closer to him and looked directly into his eyes.

"You said before that you fulfilled your responsibilities as my guardian and helped me solve problems. But you also deliberately scratched my wounds, put needles in the clothes you gave me, and found faults with me countless times, scolded me, and threatened me. Do you think these things can offset each other?"

"Now you suddenly say these words and soften your attitude, isn't it because you know about our relationship? But what if you never find out? Will I live under your oppression forever?"

Bai Jitai actually felt a little scared when facing his calm questioning, because what he said was right, and this was what he was most worried about.

If I never find out, when he makes me angry again, will I still be so cruel as to lock him in the basement until he behaves himself?

"What I did before was wrong, but I won't do it again in the future."

Perhaps this was the first time that Bai Jitai bowed to someone, letting someone who had never apologized to him bow to him. In addition to feeling funny, Bai Zhiyan also had an indescribable feeling in his heart. He suddenly understood why Bai Jitai always wanted him to obey him.

"No need."

Bai Zhiyan withdrew his hand, turned his head away and said nothing more.

Looking at his profile, Bai Jitai showed an extremely unnatural expression. He knew that what he had done in the past had deeply hurt him. But it didn't matter. As long as he was still by his side, he would forget everything in the past sooner or later.

"I'll prove it with my actions." Bai Jitai stood up, "No matter what you want, I will satisfy you."

"free."

His voice was still trembling, but he said these two words firmly, "I want freedom."

"This is the only thing that's impossible."

Bai Zhiyan turned his head slightly and gave him a contemptuous look, as if saying "I knew it would be like this."

"Then we have nothing to discuss. You can imprison me, starve me, or break my legs, whatever you want."

"I told you I won't do that again!"

Bai Jitai's emotions could no longer stabilize. He turned Bai Zhiyan's shoulders and made him look at him. "Bai Zhiyan, I told you that what I did before was wrong. Now there are only two of us in this house. Where else do you want to go? I will meet your needs as long as you don't think about leaving anymore."

He suppressed his violent emotions and tried to lower his voice, gently stroking his pale cheek, "Haven't we been living like this for a while? Eating, shopping, and watching movies together, we get along well, don't we?"

"Stop deceiving yourself, Bai Jitai." Bai Zhiyan sneered and slapped his hand away, "You clearly know that these are all fake."

"Even if it's fake, so what? I told you before, even if you're pretending, I will do everything I can to make you pretend for the rest of your life until you never want to leave me again."

But Bai Zhiyan didn't say anything else. He just looked at him quietly with his eyes as calm as an ancient well, as if he was watching him perform a one-man show.

"You speak Bai Zhiyan."

As their eyes met, Bai Jitai's hands involuntarily increased their strength, as he longed to see a hint of relaxation in the other's eyes.

However, Bai Zhiyan remained silent, which made Bai Jitai feel frustrated. Finally, he let go of his hand, took a deep breath, and tried to calm himself down.

"We still have to take care of Bai Zhengren's funeral tomorrow. It will be very busy. I will take you to rest."

Bai Jitai ignored his silence, picked him up and walked to the second floor as skillfully as usual. Bai Zhiyan did not resist the whole time.

Just before he opened the door, Bai Zhiyan suddenly said softly: "Bai Jitai, you killed my father, and I am a real orphan now."

Bai Jitai's body suddenly stiffened, he tightened his arms and stopped, he pursed his lips and looked down at Bai Zhiyan in his arms, a complicated look on his face.

"But I always have been."

It turns out that there are times when he is so touched that his voice trembles. Bai Zhiyan looked up but could only see his well-defined jawbone. Only then did he realize that he seemed to have lost a lot of weight.

Bai Jitai didn't notice Bai Zhiyan's gaze. He sighed slightly and still suppressed his emotions. "It's the same whether Bai Zhengren is alive or dead. I said I will always support you. I will always be your guardian. You are not an orphan."

"Neither do I."

He was sure that Bai Zhiyan heard what he said, but he just looked at him silently, with no sadness or anger in his eyes, only emptiness.

There was a sudden strange silence between the two of them, and finally Bai Jitai gave up letting him speak.

"Come in." With a tense face, he carried Bai Zhiyan into the room and carefully put him on the bed.

After lying down, Bai Zhiyan turned his back to Bai Jita and closed his eyes.

Bai Jitai knew that he would not be able to accept the truth for a while after learning it, but it didn’t matter, they still had a lot of time and he would think it through.

"You take a rest, I'm going out." Bai Jitai covered him with a quilt, took one last look at his back and left.

After he left, Bai Zhiyan finally couldn't hold on anymore and buried his face in the pillow.

The development of things to this point has completely exceeded his imagination. He thought that Bai Zhengren's execution would be their greatest victory, but Bai Jitai's actions involved a more cruel truth.

He began to regret it. Perhaps Bai Jitai was right. To fight against a madman like him, there was no other way but to fight to the death.

"Buzzing—"

At this moment, the cell phone suddenly rang. Bai Zhiyan didn't want to answer it, but he remembered that Ji Chengxun had just been to the scene of Bai Zhengren's death, and wondered if he had encountered an accident.

After opening his phone, he ignored everyone who sent him messages. After pulling out the dialog box with Ji Seung-hoon from the hidden interface, he discovered that he had sent him many messages.

The last message was to tell him that after testing and identification, the powder found at the scene was Bai Zhengren's ashes, and he was still worried whether he would be implicated because of Bai Zhengren's affairs.

"I'm fine, Seunghoon hyung. I'm fine."

He is not good at all.

The other side still responded to his message quickly.

"Ji Yan, I saw the news that Bai Jitai took over the Rijiang Group and became the new chairman. He got what he wanted. What about you? He has no reason to keep you in the Bai family anymore, right?"

Yes, Bai Zhiyan thought so once upon a time. He thought that as long as he didn't fight with Bai Jita, he could leave the Bai family after he got everything. But now the Bai family has become his cage.

"But I can't escape, Chengxun. As long as Bai Jitai is still here, I can't really escape from his hands."

"He won't let me go."

Ji Seung-hoon looked at the message he sent and thought of what Bai Ji-young said to him a few days ago. At that time, she only said some suggestive words vaguely, saying that Bai Ji-tae's feelings for Bai Zhiyan were abnormal to the point of being a little paranoid, but looking at the message jumping on the phone, he felt that something seemed to be wrong.

"Zhiyan, maybe the sharp arrow will pierce your heart, but as long as your wings are not damaged, you will always be free."

"I don't know what Bai Jitai did to you, and you never tell me. But you are not a bird in a cage. At least while I am still here, as long as you tell me that you need me, I will help you break the cage."

Bai Zhiyan couldn't come back to his senses for a long time looking at the message he sent. He wondered if he would compromise for a moment when he saw Bai Jita. If this thought kept appearing, would he really compromise one day?

Ji Seung-hoon is right. As long as his heart is free and as long as he still regards himself as an important person, he will escape from this cage one day.

"Thank you, Brother Chengxun, I understand. Thank you so much." He raised the corners of his mouth with some difficulty, revealing a long-lost smile.

“But Zhiyan, I won’t let you get away with this.”

"We are obviously partners, but you never tell me anything about yourself. I don't know what you think, what you mean, or even your current situation. Why don't you want to tell me? Can't we have an unconditional relationship?"

"??? ???"

Bai Zhiyan's hand holding the phone was shaking slightly. He really only reported good news and not bad news to Ji Chengxun. He didn't want to tell him about his troubles and didn't want to affect his mood.

"I'm really fine, Chengxun. It's just that Bai Zhengren died so suddenly that I was a little confused for a while. Bai Jitai's control is too strong. I always can't contact you in time, so I am depressed. I didn't mean to hide anything from you on purpose."

"You know Zhiyan, I always believe in what you say, so I also hope that you will remember to ask me for help when you encounter problems."

Bai Zhiyan felt a warm current flowing through his eyes as he looked at the message on the phone screen. His heart, which had been restless all day, finally found a home.

“I will, Seung-hoon hyung.”

"You can vent your anger on me without any scruples, and I will listen carefully.?????"

After the chat, Bai Zhiyan put down his phone. After talking with Ji Chengxun, his mood was not so bad anymore, and his chaotic emotions stabilized.

He still has things he needs to do. The most important thing now is to keep his spirits up. His psychological defenses cannot be destroyed again.

Bai Jitai did not come back that night. Bai Zhiyan slowly closed his eyes and fell asleep.

In his dream, he saw his mother, who was stroking his hair as gently as always.

"Mom, you finally came to see me..."

"I'm sorry that Zhiyan had to endure this for so long. It's Mom's fault."

Bai Zhiyan cried and hugged the woman, crying like a spoiled child as usual, "I miss you so much, mom. I'm an orphan now. Can you take me away? Every second in the world without you is so hard to endure."

“Zhiyan, my strong and brave child.” The woman caressed his hair lovingly and shed tears.

"Mom hopes you can be happy, no matter who you are, no matter whether you are rich or not, my greatest wish is that you can be healthy and happy."