Hogwarts: Bourne Returns from Warhammer

"Penny!"

Aunt Marge shouted, striding past Harry as if she were just a coat rack.

Aunt Marge and Aunt Petunia were kissing each other, but Aunt Marge was actually bumping her big chin hard against Aunt Petunia's dry, thin cheekbones.

Uncle Vernon also came in, with a pleasant smile on his face, and closed the door of his house.

"Have a seat and have some tea, Maggie. My client brought some new tea from China. Not the Indian black tea that's all going to mold. You can try it."

Then he asked, "Maggie, why didn't you take the train? Didn't you agree that I would pick you up last night?"

"For safety," Aunt Maggie answered simply.

She looked at Dudley, then gave her brother Vernon a look that said: Now is not the time to talk about this.

They filed into the kitchen, leaving Harry alone in the hall with his trunk - which was exactly what Harry wanted - thank God for any excuse not to be with Aunt Marge.

He began to slowly move the boxes upstairs to the guest bedroom, stalling for as much time as possible.

When he returned to the kitchen, Aunt Marge had already placed freshly brewed tea and fruit cake in front of her, and Lippy was licking his own milk in the corner. Harry saw Aunt Petunia frowning slightly because the dog's saliva and milk splashed on the floor she had just cleaned, which was the most annoying thing for housewives.

"If you can use magic to do housework, this is actually just a matter of 'cleaning up'." Harry thought with a bit of gloating.

However, he soon realized a problem: he still lived in this house, and it seemed that he had to do chores such as mopping the floor.

It's very questionable.

Aunt Marge and Vernon, who came to visit, chatted enthusiastically about family matters. The brother and sister discussed everything from "May the Queen be blessed with good health" to "Guardrails should be installed on the platforms of Surrey train stations", and finally they discussed the issue of Dudley and Harry's schooling.

Aunt Marge was very satisfied with the elite aristocratic school that Dudley attended.

The only advice she gave to this lovely nephew was: "Oh, my dear Dada, there is nothing wrong with boys playing games like boxing, but they should never get together with some messy people and play weird games in some shady places."

As for Harry, Aunt Marge also gave him a piece of advice: "Listen carefully, boy. I know the principal of St. Bruce's School. If you don't want to be whipped, you must behave yourself."

"Did you hear the news this morning, Maggie? What's that about the criminal on the run, huh?"

Uncle Vernon did not want his sister to continue talking. After all, she was a detective from Scotland Yard, and if Harry Potter let slip, the disgraceful fact that he went to a "pig wart" school would most likely be exposed no longer.

Maggie was stunned for a moment when she heard Vernon asking this question. She suddenly felt that her butt was a little uncomfortable sitting on the seat.

After a pause, she found a comfortable seat and sat down again before she spoke again: "Vernon, I know that besides Dudley, you are the smartest boy in our Dursley family - nothing can be hidden from you."

Vernon: "..."

Meanwhile, Dudley had gone off to watch TV, while Harry was busy with his Aunt Petunia preparing a hearty lunch, which involved the arduous task of opening various cans of meat and vegetables with a can opener and cutting open new packets of curry seasoning.

"Vernon, if that brat turns out to be a criminal, don't blame yourself." Aunt Marge glanced at Harry. "If something is broken in the bones, no one can do anything about it."

Uncle Vernon was confused by his sister's words. He certainly didn't think Harry Potter would become a lawyer, doctor or other respectable person in the future. But to be honest, he didn't think that this kid would become a criminal.

"That fellow named Potter, the bastard who caused a scene at your wedding with Peggy," Aunt Maggie said as she leaned over and grabbed the brandy bottle and poured some into the short glass in front of her. A lot of the wine spilled on the tablecloth. She seemed a little excited. "Although you never told me what he does, what do I do? I can tell who that guy is at a glance."

Uncle Vernon suddenly became very nervous.

"He... that man doesn't have a job," said Uncle Vernon, glancing furtively at Harry. "He lives on the government dole."

"I expected it!" said Aunt Marge, taking a swig of brandy and wiping her chin with her sleeve. "Another scumbag, lazy, liar, good-for-nothing who's riding on taxpayers' money. In short, that guy is a hippie magician."

At this moment, the wine glass in Aunt Maggie's hand suddenly exploded, and glass fragments flew everywhere.

Aunt Maggie stammered and blinked stupidly, with wine dripping down her fat red face.

"Marge!" Uncle Vernon screamed. "Marge, are you all right?"

"Don't worry," Aunt Marge muttered, wiping her face with her napkin. "I must have squeezed it too hard. Don't make a fuss, little Vernon. You know I have a very strong hand..."

Vernon looked at her worriedly, then glared fiercely towards the kitchen. He guessed that this matter was probably related to that boy.

"... Let's get back to the topic, Vernon." Maggie noticed Vernon's expression and reached out to snap her fingers in front of her brother's fat face.

"I drove to your house purely for safety reasons. The source of the safety hazard is a guy like this 'Porter' - or worse - a guy named 'Fang Thomas', who is probably a Frenchman."

"Fang Thomas?" Vernon blinked. He felt that the name was a little familiar.

Then he remembered, wasn't this the name of the thief who had just appeared in the news who had stolen from the British Museum?

"Although Thomas Fang is probably similar to Potter, and is probably a hippie-like second-rate guy, he is indeed quite capable. He stole a collection from the British Museum right under the noses of our Scotland Yard."

Vernon was curious, so he asked, "What collection? It's not on TV."

Perhaps she felt safe in her brother's house, so Maggie whispered, "It should be the legendary Golden Apple - the legendary antique that was first brought to Constantinople by the Greeks, then snatched by the Venetians, and finally bought back by us British."

-

"Merlin's beard! Teddy, what did you eat?"

Newt Scamander couldn't help but let out a cry of surprise when he saw Sniff, who was sleeping soundly with a half-eaten golden fruit in his arms.

In order to find Teddy Niffler, this top magical animal expert who is famous throughout the wizarding world actually stripped off all the clothes on the "mysterious man" in front of Bourne, leaving only a pair of shorts on his body.

There were even many small incidents during the period: many guests in the hostel were attracted by the noise made earlier, and after the initial fear, they also walked out of their rooms to investigate; when they saw an old gentleman in a suit and leather shoes stripping off a man's clothes, many people exclaimed - some people felt that the world was going downhill, and some people complained that such an exciting activity didn't invite them to join...

Unfortunately, no matter what their plans were, all of these people were knocked unconscious by a punch from Bourne, who was lurking in the shadows, and were neatly stacked in the corridor of the hostel like chickens on a supermarket shelf.

Because Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry is on summer vacation, and the Ministry of Magic will probably be here soon, Bourne thinks he should use his wand as little as possible to cast spells. After all, he is a model little wizard who abides by laws and regulations.

At the same time, Professor Scamander was sweating anxiously, squatting on the ground with a frown, carefully examining and sniffing Teddy.

This little magical animal was lying on a small bed made of glittering gold coin chocolate wrappers, with some fruit paste hanging from the corners of its mouth. Its eyes were closed and its breathing was steady. It didn't look like it had suffered any serious harm.

However, even so, Professor Scamander still seemed a little worried because he could not recognize what plant the golden apple came from.

"I have to get you some antidote, just in case." As he said this, he opened his suitcase and took out some bottles and cans.

At this moment, Bourne also noticed the half golden fruit that Teddy had left. Suddenly, a gleam of light flashed in his eyes, as if he remembered something.

"Professor Scamander, wait a minute." Bourne said hurriedly, with a hint of relief in his voice, "I think I know what Teddy ate."

Professor Scamander turned around and looked at Bourne in confusion: "You know? What is that?"

Bourne's eyes suddenly lit up. He recognized the thing that Teddy was eating. It looked like the legendary "golden apple" - the seed planted by his pet Khan in the Forbidden Forest also produced similar fruit.

Bourne nodded and said with a smile: "Yes, this looks like the fruit of some kind of plant, and it has the effect of increasing wisdom potion."

Professor Scamander's eyes widened, he couldn't believe his ears: "Potion to increase wisdom? How is this possible?"