Personality V: I will save everything

William sat quietly beside the bed, holding his father's rough but warm hand tightly, without saying a word. His heart seemed to be pressed down by a heavy force, making it difficult for him to breathe, and he didn't know how to speak.

Time passed by minute by minute, with only faint breathing and occasional coughing in the room. William's thoughts were tangled like a tangled mess, and he remembered his father's past behavior, the unreasonable scolding, and the pain of the whip on his back, which now became a stinging pain in his memory.

Finally, William could no longer bear the depressing atmosphere, he slowly stood up and staggered towards the window. His hands were shaking as he gently pulled up the curtains to let in the weak sunlight.

Then he opened the window, and a gust of fresh air blew in his face, making him feel comfortable.

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"Mother's dancing shoes glimmer with pearls as they sway,

Her skirts spin open like moonlit flowers at play.

Father's pocket watch ticks a lullaby soft and low,

Honey drips on gingerbread, sweet as snow.

Mom's dancing shoes are adorned with pearls

The skirt swirls open the moonlight flowers

Dad's pocket watch ticks and sings nursery rhymes

Honey sprinkled on gingerbread

I tie Mother's satin ribbons, fluttering light,

Polish Father's copper candlesticks glowing bright.

The crystal chandelier spins round and round,

Laughter hides in lace handkerchiefs, safe and sound.

I tie the ribbon for my mother

Help dad polish the copper candle flowers

The crystal chandelier is spinning around and around

Laughter hidden in the lace handkerchief

Oh, how I long to wear a swan dress soon,

To dance on tiptoe like Mother under lofty moons.

Learn from Father to blend spiced tea warm and mild,

Guard this cozy home, a precious fairy-tale child.

I want to put on the swan skirt as soon as possible

Like my mother dancing on tiptoe

Learn to make sweet spice tea like dad

Protect this warm fairy tale home"

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William pushed open the mottled wooden window irritably, and the rusty hinges made a harsh squeak.

The bright sunlight suddenly poured into the room, causing him to squint his eyes, but it also tore a hole in the haze in his heart.

In the open space outside the house, Stellan, Inara, Alessio and Stral were busy happily.

They found a piece of white chalk from somewhere and carefully outlined on the mossy stone floor.

The rustling sound of chalk scratching across the ground was like composing a mysterious magic spell. After a while, a hopscotch grid decorated with crooked flowers was born.

The children's clear laughter drifted in the wind.

They hummed strange yet beautiful songs and skipped between the cubicles.

The sunlight sprinkled gently on their smiling faces, gilded their hair, and even the dust raised when they danced was shining with fine light, just like a group of elves pampered by the sun.

William looked at this lively scene, and his frown gradually relaxed.

Those carefree figures and the songs as cheerful as silver bells were like a clear spring, slowly soaking his heart which was cold due to the estrangement between him and his father.

Yes, he didn't come here to quarrel...

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William slowly turned his head and his eyes fell on the photos on the wall. These photos recorded his growth from childhood to adulthood, and each one carried his memories and his father's love.

William rarely returned home after leaving home at the age of 15. But his father never forgot him and quietly collected his photos and reports, carefully pasting them on the wall.

Looking at these photos, William couldn't help but feel warm in his heart. He began to realize that this seemingly serious father actually loved him deeply.

"Father..." William finally couldn't help but whispered the word. This was the first time he called his father like this in many years, with a hint of hesitation and emotion in his voice.

Hearing William's call, the man on the bed moved slightly, as if awakened from a deep sleep.

He slowly opened his eyes and looked at William with some confusion.

My father lay on the creaking wooden bed, his unshaven chin stained with medicine, and his usually loud voice now sounded like a leaky bellows: "...Have you had enough of the wildness?"

"Brother said you..." William's words were interrupted by a violent cough. His father reached for the enamel cup on the bedside table, but knocked over the kerosene lamp, and the dim light cast a trembling shadow on the wall.

William caught a glimpse of a piece of paper sticking out from under the pillow. It was the note he left when he left home, with crooked ears of wheat drawn on the back.

"Do you think I want to lock you up?" Father suddenly spoke, and the photo on the bedside table fell to the ground with a dull sound. "Before your sister died, she held my fingers and said, 'Father, my hands are so cold'... On the day your brother vomited black blood, your mother was still wiping her damn dishes, saying, 'It's just a normal fever'..."

He suddenly laughed, his laughter was like a broken bellows, "I locked you up because I was afraid that you would become like them, rotting in my arms..."

William dug his nails into his palms. He remembered that when he was seventeen, his father used a belt to beat his back until it bled while he was climbing over the wall. But late at night, he found his father squatting beside his bed, gently applying herbal ointment to the wound, tears dripping on his shoulder.

At that time he thought it was hypocrisy, but now he realized that it was a clumsy embrace of a man in the abyss.

"My brother...he always cries at night." William heard his voice trembling, "He said he would rather die of plague than be locked up as a fool..."

His father looked up suddenly, pain flashing in his eyes. He pointed to the wooden box on top of the wardrobe with a trembling hand. The lock was the lock that William had broken when he left home - he bought it with the money he had saved for three months.

"Inside... is your brother's diary." The father panted, "He said... he envied you for having the courage to break the window..."

"I'm afraid..." His father's thumb stroked the pink ribbon on his wrist, which was tied by Inara for William. "I'm afraid that you will be like them, falling in the wild and no one will collect your body..."

The old man suddenly laughed. The corners of his wrinkled eyes seemed to be inlaid with wheat awns, and the slightly upturned corners of his mouth revealed a hint of helplessness and doting.

"But you insisted on going to the city and learning those..." The old man paused, as if thinking about how to describe it, then he coughed lightly and continued, "Running around like a buffalo."

His voice was a little hoarse, as if the years had left traces in his throat. However, despite this, there was still a hint of reproach in his words, just like the care and concern of an elder for a younger generation.

The old man shook his head slowly, then turned his head and his eyes fell on the photo on the wall.

It was a photo of William leading his team to win the championship. In the photo, William had a bright smile, full of confidence and vitality.

The old man stared at the photo, was silent for a while, and then said softly: "But maybe now it seems that I was wrong..." There was a hint of emotion in his voice, as if he had a new understanding of his past thoughts.

Finally, the old man sighed deeply, as if he had put down a big stone in his heart. He said slowly: "Some people are born to be unable to be locked up........."

This sentence seems to be an understanding of William, and also a recognition of those souls in life that cannot be bound.

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"You were wrong........." But it seems you were not wrong.

Yes, no matter what, wasn’t William’s father’s original purpose in doing these things just to protect his two children?

A father has already experienced the painful baptism of the plague and has lost two children, so he wants to protect his only remaining child. What's wrong with that?

It's a pity that the purpose was good. If the means were not so extreme, William and his father would not have become so tense now.

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“They are so cute….”

The houses in the past were not very tall, and they were on the first floor, so William's father only had to turn his head slightly to see Inara and the others playing outside.

Coincidentally, there are four children, a brother, a sister and two brothers.............

Looking at the four children playing outside, William's father shed tears for some reason. If he had a choice, he also hoped that his four children could play happily outside like this...

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William watched this scene and said nothing. He just silently stretched out his fingers to wipe away his father's tears.

"But it's a coincidence that of the two brothers, the older one is more athletically talented, while the younger one is the more obedient one."

Alessio and Strahl are the exact opposite of Thomas and William.

"is that so..........."

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William knew what his father wanted to say.

In fact, William was also surprised that these four children corresponded exactly to his former family: an older brother, an older sister, and two younger brothers.

That's why William was happy to take them out to play, take them running around the streets, and take them to eat ice cream, because those were things that his past self could not experience, and it was like compensating for his past self.

But when Alessio showed more athletic talent than Stral, William woke up.

No one should bear any responsibilities and expectations that have nothing to do with him or her for the sake of those who have died. That would be unfair to both the living and the dead.

They are just themselves and should not bear expectations that do not belong to them for anyone or any reason.

Shouldn't William understand this truth very well?

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"Uncle William!" the children shouted in unison, with a hint of worry in their voices. They stared at Uncle William's gloomy face with wide eyes, wondering if there had been another quarrel between him and Uncle Thomas.

However, when Uncle William's eyes met the children's, his expression changed instantly. His face, which was originally cloudy, quickly blossomed into a bright smile as if penetrated by the sun.

"Oh, kids, don't worry." Uncle William's voice was gentle and kind, as if the gloom just now was just a short dream, "I'm fine, everything is fine."

He took a deep breath and then exhaled slowly, as if to expel the heaviness in his heart.

With each breath, the children seemed to feel Uncle William's mood gradually calming down.

"In fact," Uncle William went on, his tone becoming lighter, "I have never felt better than I do now."