Siheyuan: Rebirth 54 years ago, neighbor is stupid

Because of the emotional preparation, when Li Zhenmin shifted the topic to Ma Lanlan, Hu Yong no longer had any resistance.

Being asked this suddenly, Hu Yong couldn't help but feel a little nervous and didn't know how to answer for a moment.

Li Zhenmin smiled and continued, "As someone who has been through this, I'd like to say one more thing. You can talk about dating however you want, but when it comes to marriage, it's best to think about it more carefully. Marriage and living together is a lifelong thing, and the most important thing is whether the two of you can get along well."

"Some people are not suitable, but because they feel fresh and passionate when dating, they will ignore or not care about some details, thinking that no matter what, they are fine. Even tolerating the other person's mistakes will make them feel satisfied, feel needed, and be happy."

"But freshness and passion have a shelf life. Liking a person is the same as liking an object. After a long time, even the most favorite thing will become boring. But people are different from objects. When you get bored with an object, you can put it aside and it won't bother you anymore. But when you get bored with a person, you can't put it aside."

"If you are tired of someone, but they still appear in your life every day, you will inevitably feel disgusted. If both parties view each other this way, then marriage will really become the grave of love. The capable party will find a new love, and the incompetent party will be bullied."

"So, dating is different from getting married and living together. Marriage is more about the compatibility of two people's personalities. It doesn't require that they will bring you excitement, but you must not feel disgusted when you see each other. It is best that both parties consider each other's feelings. Even if you don't encourage each other, try not to create emotional garbage."

"You can date anyone, but when it comes to marriage and life, it's more suitable to have someone who respects you and knows how to behave."

Li Zhenmin said a lot as the eldest brother.

Hu Yong couldn't understand it all, but he understood part of it. He thought about some issues from his own perspective and wondered whether Ma Lanlan was the kind of person suitable for marriage as his elder brother said.

However, the conclusion is that the person Malanlan said to her eldest brother about who to marry is completely different.

So he retorted out of curiosity: "Brother, is it as exaggerated as you say? Besides, people will change. They may be impetuous when they are dating, but after getting married and having a family and children, some things will slowly change, right?"

Li Zhenmin nodded in agreement: "Well, that's true. Generally speaking, people will change with the environment and conditions, but changes can be good or bad. What makes people better and what makes them worse? Some people may know how to be grateful and work harder because of worse conditions, but some people may become more and more violent or self-destructive because of worse conditions, or even cheat and make other choices, right?"

"Ah?" Hu Yong suddenly found it difficult to refute and once again felt that he seemed too young.

So after thinking about it, he asked, "Isn't it the same for everyone? It's impossible to know how others will change from the beginning, right? And if you work hard to improve your conditions, some things won't happen, right?"

Li Zhenmin thought it was funny, but he still patiently replied, "This is a test of how well you judge people, and judging people mainly involves analyzing them from daily details. For example, if your partner is angry, you have to see why they are angry and whether you can make up for it."

"If you earn 20 yuan a month, and your girlfriend asks you to buy her a watch during the holidays, but you don't buy her one, she will get angry and won't be able to coax her. She will say that she should have something else too, and asks why your salary is not 100 yuan, why you are not motivated, and why you can't give her a sense of security, so she will break up with you."

"If you buy it under the same conditions and she gets angry, and you can't coax her, she'll say you're wasting money and you can't give her a sense of security, and she'll want to break up with you."

"Which of these two do you choose?"

"There are many such cases, such as those who compare themselves with others, those who spend money lavishly, and those who are stingy. There are those who cheat on their partners, and so on. You may have overlooked these when you were dating, but you cannot help but consider them when you are getting married. Does the other person have any flaws? Are the flaws serious? Are they serious enough for you to accept?"

"Everyone has shortcomings of one kind or another. The question is whether they are excessive or not. Do you have to be like this every time? If you can accept that, then it doesn't matter. If you can't accept that, then it's better not to get married impulsively. You are still young and have the conditions. It's not like you don't have a choice."

As Hu Yong listened, he became confused.

The idea his parents and grandmother conveyed to him was to get married as soon as possible, without considering the woman's condition at all. As long as she was not a heinous criminal or too ugly to be looked at, it seemed that the sooner they got married, the better.

But my eldest brother said the exact opposite.

The latter was obviously easier for him to accept, because it seemed that he was really thinking about the problem from his perspective. What's more, this person was called Li Zhenmin, which invisibly increased the credibility of these words.

Of course, despite this, young people full of vigor and vitality cannot understand everything. They may think it makes sense now, but they will forget it after a while.

Ultimately, it depends on who you usually hang out with.

Immature people are often easily influenced by the words of people around them, and Hu Yong has not yet exceeded this category.

Li Zhenmin also knew this, so he had no hope of completely changing Hu Yong's mind. He just wanted to plant a seed in his heart.

So taking advantage of this opportunity, Li Zhenmin asked again: "By the way, what do you think of Ma Lanlan? Do you want to marry her, or are you just dating her?"

When Hu Yong was asked about the key point, he thought for a long time and finally replied: "I am thinking about getting married. If I don't get married, then wouldn't it be hooliganism to date someone?"

Li Zhenmin joked, "What if she was playing a trick on you? We gay men also have chastity, right? Who says that when a relationship breaks up, the woman has to suffer? We gay men have to protect ourselves well when we are out, right?"

puff--

Hu Yong spat out a mouthful of tea and coughed continuously for a while.

"Brother, you will be scolded if you say this."

"Tsk, you have a fixed mindset, right? There are unfaithful men and fickle women, right? You think it's a prejudice that women value chastity more. To put it another way, suppose a woman has affairs with several men at the same time, and then gets pregnant. In the end, she finds the one with the best conditions. Does that man know that the child is his? What about the other men? Wouldn't they be at a disadvantage? Isn't that the truth?"

"You...what you said is just speculation. If there is any, it is only a very rare case."

"But it's rare for a man to do that. Not every man is unfaithful. At least I'm not, and neither are you, right?"

"Uh...."

Hu Yong is really crazy, how can he understand it this way?

Li Zhenmin stopped joking and brought the topic back to the topic, continuing: "Are you sure you want to marry Ma Lanlan?"