Love in Cthulhu

Chapter 18 Miss Monster's Self-Conquest

From the moment this thing appeared, the rising black mist engulfed Gan Tang's body, like a smoke bomb exploding.

So far, Zhou Nan has not seen any strange creatures that are supposedly possessed; the ones he has seen on the road are just bodies with flames breathing out mist.

The one in front of us was practically a walking smoke generator; with each breath, it covered the lawn in a thick layer of smoke. Even a fool could see that this was in a completely different league from the little devils by the roadside.

"Now you know, we really are the same kind." Even so, Gan Tang still didn't show much expression, but her voice sounded more mournful. "Can you see it?"

Zhou Nan didn't know how to answer. Jian Xi explained that those things would target people who could see, and if you let them discover that you could actually see, they would come after you.

But now the person asking him that question is a human girl. Does this rule still apply? Is she on the side of humans? Or is she truly possessed?

He couldn't gamble, especially since this thing had been shrieking ever since it came out, its arms tightly wrapped around Gan Tang, howling at him like a ghost. Although it didn't ask if he could see it, even a fool could see the hostility it was showing. It was probably the thing that had just caused the trouble.

"I'm sorry, I really don't know what you're talking about." Zhou Nan could only pretend to be clueless.

Something faint in Gan Tang's eyes seemed to finally go out. After a long silence, she slowly squatted down, hugged her knees with both hands, and buried her head deeply without saying a word. The black mist that naturally emanated from her strange body grew thicker and thicker, like a silent tide that was slowly about to engulf her.

Zhou Nan couldn't see her face, but he could tell how sad she was.

At this moment, he instinctively wanted to pat her shoulder and say a few words of comfort, but as soon as he reached out, the strange creature on Gan Tang's back seemed to be facing a formidable enemy, suddenly turning its head and hissing and roaring, revealing spear-like fangs, and spewing out more dark clouds from the dark cave, covering his feet.

"Ouch, my head is so itchy." Zhou Nan quickly raised his hand, scratched his hair, muttered to himself, and turned to leave.

This time, Gan Tang did not chase after him; he walked away along the lawn.

But suddenly he felt a pang of pity and looked back again. The girl squatting on the ground looked lonely, like a little dog that had been abandoned.

This is so annoying. I'm risking my life right now. You know you might die if you associate with me.
He was full of complaints, but he still went back as if possessed.

In the end, he has always been a kind-hearted person. If he were a bad person, he wouldn't care whether Jian Xi would eat people or not. Instead, he could tell her, "Wow, your ability is awesome! Let's become the gods of the new world together!"
From then on, he joined her in committing all sorts of evil deeds, targeting anyone he disliked. He would deliberately block the way home of hooligans in the alleys of illegal internet cafes, forcing them to pay for their lives, becoming a lawless and arrogant young master.

But he was a delusional teenager who believed in light. Whether it was a good thing or a bad thing didn't really matter. What mattered was that he would feel uneasy if he did something bad. He could only blame the pretty girl for being too cunning.

As he drew closer, the strange creature on Gan Tang's body began to hiss again, twisting and contorting in a ferocious manner, and black mist rose up like a malevolent spirit.

But Zhou Nan couldn't be bothered to pay attention. What difference would it make if he just pretended not to see it? It would just be a little annoying to his ears.

He stuck the torn-off sticky note on Gan Tang's forehead. Gan Tang looked up blankly, and their eyes met. Zhou Nan realized that she hadn't actually shed tears. She was just so sad that she was about to cry, so she was holding it in. But being about to cry and actually crying are two completely different things.

I instantly felt like I was just meddling... but I couldn't back out.

“This is my QQ number,” he said. “I’m very busy, with a lot of things to do every day. If you really insist on talking, then at least let’s see when you’re free. I don’t have time today.”

Gan Tang looked into his eyes, took the sticky note off his forehead, and it was indeed a string of numbers.

She tugged at the corners of her mouth, as if she wanted to laugh, but it was just a fleeting tug before she lowered her head again and stuffed the note into the pocket of her trench coat.

Suddenly a strong wind blew, and the hideous head on Gantang's back suddenly swelled up, like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon, spreading out a sky full of black clouds.

First, a leg emerged, followed by hand after hand. It was like a wriggling centipede. Its upper body still had human-like features, but its lower body was already a worm-like shape with twisted and intertwined limbs. Its abdomen was swollen, and it writhed and howled strangely. It opened its dark hole in Zhou Nan's face, and a thick, fishy wind rushed towards him.

Gan Tang was startled and quickly stood up and hid behind it, but its body was several meters long, and the part that had already emerged was enough to push out a bit further.

"Don't look—don't come near!"

The distance was only inches, and that hollow, rotting face seemed to rush up to kiss him, its sharp teeth clearly visible, almost biting Zhou Nan's throat.

But Zhou Nan remained expressionless. He was truly terrified. Once he was frightened enough, nothing could frighten him a second time. His strong materialistic mentality was itself the most powerful exorcism method.

Although Jian Xi's existence has completely shattered his understanding of the world, it does not prevent him from facing such things calmly.

Gan Tang should be able to see it too, right? I remember she just apologized, and now that Gan Tang got up and ran away, she probably can't control this thing.

It's really awful to think about. Compared to seeing a ghost when you lift the covers at night, it's much more suffocating to have something dirty living on you. I wonder if Gan Tang is ever scared enough to actually cry. Is a soft girl really that brave?
He suddenly realized that he was overthinking things. These were not things he should care about. Gan Tang was indeed one of his kind, and he had many things he wanted to ask her, but there was a monster girl waiting for him at home. Before dealing with things there, it was best not to get too involved.

So he waved goodbye, and before leaving, he wanted to pull her away one last time. He put one hand in his pocket, imitating Xu Zhimo, leaving without a trace, only his back view for Gan Tang and her cool stand-in.

…………

"Little Bear, Little Bear, let me ask you, should I say yes or no to him?"

Jianxi was rolling around on the bed, hugging her Rilakkuma bear.

Since returning home this morning, she's been in a state of blissful pink bubble bath, sometimes dangling her toes and tapping the bed, sometimes lying flat and spinning like a clock, half her body on the bed with only her head sticking out, her disheveled hair touching the floor in a messy tangle, holding her Rilakkuma high in the air, staring at its silly, beady eyes. She knows this is called love, but love is a very complicated thing for her, so complicated that she still hasn't figured it out after all this time.

If we sort out the sequence of events, firstly, she is a strange thing who doesn't even know what she is. She seems to have great power, but she has no memory, intelligence, or personality, so of course she has no idea what love is.

But she ended up consuming everything about Jian Xi except her body. From that girl's perspective, even the former Jian Xi herself could vaguely sense the affection between them.

So why don't these two idiots just get together? They're childhood sweethearts, a match made in heaven, even a monster couldn't object.

She thought about it for a long time and came to the conclusion that Jian Xi was too conflicted. She pretended to flirt with Zhou Nan every day, but she didn't want him to actually push her. She kept saying that as her older sister, she would definitely protect him, but she secretly wondered when this blockhead would open up and take the initiative. He was usually so arrogant that he wanted to kill the world, but when it came to her, he didn't even dare to take the first step.

So can we say Jian Xi doesn't like Zhou Nan? Nonsense, she likes him a lot.

Such feelings now rejoiced in her heart as the heir, and she was overjoyed when he took the initiative to say it, wishing she could agree to it immediately.

However, she also understood that the Jian Xi that Zhou Nan liked was not the Jian Xi she was.

She repeatedly emphasized to Zhou Nan that she was Jian Xi, hoping that he wouldn't separate the two of them so clearly. She didn't mind living as a substitute for Jian Xi. After all, she had never been a human before, and she won the grand prize right from the start. How could she not be happy?

To my shame, these past two nights she's been taking showers with the heater on, stripping herself naked and staring at herself in the dressing mirror for ages.

Her skin was so smooth and delicate, and her figure was flawless except for her small, round face. Every smile and frown seemed to wash away even the dust in the sunlight. Just looking at her made my head spin, and I wanted to lean over and kiss her. She was supposed to be a beauty that could shame the moon and make the fish sink and the geese fall from the sky, and this beauty was me! It was like I had a life that was completely cheated!

She's so beautiful, how could she not be liked? Is it wrong to want to like someone? Is it wrong? No, it isn't.

Just thinking about it makes her face flush. The original person was too irresponsible, both incompetent and prone to dancing, making her the same kind now. When she thought about Zhou Nan confessing, she couldn't help but let her imagination run wild, imagining things like them snuggling into a bed together and him massaging her shoulders, or him burying his head in her chest and begging for a hug...

Ahhhhhh! She burrowed into the blankets, curled up like a caterpillar, her whole body burning hot, wriggling and squirming.

Can't you think about this too much? It's not suitable for children! Although she may have lived for countless years as a monster, this body is only sixteen years old, right? It hasn't developed to that stage yet! If they were really in a relationship, it would just be holding hands and kissing, which would already be very advanced and beautiful!

She was lost in thought, daydreaming and imagining, and before she knew it, her mouth was stretched almost to her ears in a silly grin.

Then I'll just accept him. Although thinking this way, it seems a little unfair to Jian Xi.

But Jian Xi is already dead, isn't she? Everything I got from her shows that she had this wish in her heart.

If she really chooses to be with Zhou Nan, according to the human world's concepts, wouldn't that be considered inheriting his will? This is a good thing, anyway, that's what everyone around them thinks. They can naturally have a relationship, and then she, this monster, will be the real Jian Xi. No one will know this secret. Exams, graduation, university, marriage, and finally having twins or something.

Wait a minute, can this body of mine reproduce? Although the one I sculpted is absolutely perfect, a one-to-one replica, with all the necessary organs, pregnancy is... I have no accurate knowledge about it, neither in my past life nor this one. It's a bit beyond my understanding.

Why don't you find an excuse to try dating him first?
This is not called tasting forbidden fruit; it is called thinking about everyone's happy life, and it is a perfectly reasonable and legitimate scientific experiment.

Well, that's right.

As she was thinking, she jumped out of bed, her toes dangling on the floor as she searched for her slippers. But she couldn't find them for a long time, so she used her shadow. The shadow seeped under the bed like flowing water, spread across the floor, found the slippers, grabbed them, and threw them out with a sudden, forceful motion.

The slipper that flew out hit the opposite wall with a thud. Jian Xi was stunned for a moment. Every time this happened, she would clearly realize that she was something different. Then she would think of the look in Zhou Nan's eyes when he looked at her.

In my memory, those dark eyes were always so gentle. When I teased him, they would dodge and refuse to look me in the eye. When they were angry, they could be as fierce as knives, and the way they rolled their eyes was enough to make anyone shudder.

But those memories haven't come back for a long time. The reason a memory is called a memory is because you can no longer have it. If it were something that could be easily retrieved, there would be no need to recall it.

Why is this? Just think about it with your clever little brain and you'll know. It's because you keep saying you want to be Jian Xi, but you don't act like her at all.

It can eat people, turn into a shadow, heal fatal wounds, replicate anything, and see things that shouldn't be visible.

She sat on the edge of the bed, looking at her hand that had turned into a shadow, and remained silent for a long time. This was how she originally looked, but now she didn't like her dark and gloomy self at all. She thought human fingers were much more beautiful.

She stood up, walked to the wall, picked up the slippers, and used her shadow to put them back under the bed.

Then, she slowly lay down on the cold floor and reached out to touch it.

I must have been in such a rush when I got back that I jumped onto the bed with a kick, so my initial position was a bit deep, and I couldn't reach it with just my fingers; I just missed.

She went back and found the clothesline, then reached in again and slowly poked at it, picking up the slipper and sweeping it out.

It took quite a bit of effort, but she felt very happy because the real Jian Xi wouldn't have such superhuman abilities. As an ordinary girl, shouldn't she rely on her own hands to solve these small difficulties in life?

If things can continue like this from now on, then she can become more and more like the real Jian Xi, and then he will no longer look at her with those eyes that look like a monster, right?

(End of this chapter)