I am a literary giant in Russia

Chapter 79 Who would write a diary if they were serious?

After listening to Turgenev's bragging in the cafe that day, although Mikhail seemed to be about to become rich, seeing Turgenev's arrogant tone, Mikhail still urged Turgenev to pay for the coffee.

It can be seen that Brother Tu really doesn't have much money in his pocket, but he doesn't care at all. He immediately waved his hand and said:

"No problem! I'll pay for this."

This elegant demeanor made the young Dostoevsky envious again.
Mikhail could only say that if Lao Tu's mother had not died early, Lao Tu might still be suffering in debt somewhere.

Although Lao Tu's mother is gone, he has indeed become stronger. Pah! What a joke in hell, I have to knock on the wooden fish when I have time.

After the old butcher paid the money, the few of them talked quite enthusiastically for a while, and then went back home to do their own things.

Before parting, Mikhail noticed the young Dostoevsky's anxiety, so he patted him on the shoulder and said with a smile, "Don't worry, Fyodor. Don't worry about your novel. I promise you, it will be a sensation in St. Petersburg, and you'll see many people talking about it."

Dostoyevsky: “!”

We've only met a few times, and he already calls me Fyodor.
It seems that we are no longer strangers to each other.

As the young Dostoyevsky was excited, he also heard Mikhail continue, "But I hope you can stay sober after becoming famous. You know, no one can always be successful, and writers and artists often face more challenges and hardships. So, whether you succeed or fail, it's best to maintain a peaceful state of mind."

Dostoyevsky: “?”

But why do I feel like you are always successful?
Dostoevsky naturally nodded in agreement to Mikhail's sincere words. However, after parting ways, he couldn't help but look at Nekrasov, who was still traveling with him, and asked, "Nicholas, when Mikhail became famous in St. Petersburg, what was his reaction? Didn't he seem very happy and excited?"

"No."

After careful recollection, Nekrasov gave his own answer: "He didn't seem to think it was a big deal. In the face of our enthusiastic praise, admiration, and cheers, he remained quite calm from beginning to end, and even calmed Vissarion's overly excited nerves. I have never met a more humble person."

Oh yes, he was still very excited when he received the royalties, Nekrasov added in his heart.

Of course, Nekrasov did not tell Dostoevsky this.

And who knows whether Mikhail is really excited or not? Maybe he is just joking for others to see, Nekrasov thought to himself.

"What a saintly man!"

Hearing Nekrasov's answer, Dostoevsky immediately shook his head in amazement, and then secretly kept Mikhail's words deep in his heart.

Of course, he listened to it, but as he heard his novels from others more and more times and heard more and more people talking about him, the young Dostoevsky inevitably felt a little elated.

Fortunately, I have heard Mikhail's novels and poems many times, so the pretentious Dostoevsky classmate didn't pretend to be too good after all.
Several days passed in the blink of an eye. As for the sales of "Petersburg Anthology", although Mikhail found that it was selling very well after an on-site inspection, in order to be on the safe side, Mikhail decided to wait for a while and see the situation.

During the time of waiting, Mikhail was more or less uneasy because he had been fantasizing that he might become a rich man. The things he had been doing before were somewhat put on hold, but when he stopped doing these things, Mikhail didn't know what to do.

So after a while, Mikhail, who was bored, tried to make a simple record of his life and what was happening around him.

Of course, it can actually be considered as writing practice. For example, Lao Tu’s "Hunter's Notes" is a classic note-style novel. It is basically writing a diary while talking about one's own experiences and expressing feelings.

That's essentially what Mikhail is doing.

However, when it comes to his personal life, Mikhail still embellished it more or less:
"The 15th, Thursday. Another day to study German. I feel like I should be able to master this language soon. Keep working hard." "The 16th, Friday. A day for a party at Panaev's house. At this party, Vissarion and I talked for a long time about literature and art. I love listening to them talk about these things. Sometimes when I hear something particularly touching, I feel so happy."

"Monday, the 19th. Another day of studying hard. I'm poring over Hegel's philosophy. Although some parts are a bit obscure, the moment I truly understood his thoughts, I felt a genuine joy."

"On the 23rd, Friday, we met again at the Panayevs'. I asked them some philosophical questions. These esteemed gentlemen had a very deep understanding of these philosophical questions, and I discussed them with them for a long time."

These are the things that can be written in the notes, and what cannot be written are basically Mikhail's observations on the changes in Lao Tzu in recent times.

As the saying goes, gold will always shine, and pure gold in the literary circle like Lao Tuo is naturally unlikely to be buried easily.

After the "Petersburg Anthology" was published for some time, more and more readers paid attention to Dostoevsky's "Poor People". Some praised it, while others criticized it. However, in Belinsky's small circle, most people gave Dostoevsky's work very sincere praise.

It is almost as Panaev later put it in his memoirs:

"Every new phenomenon in literature, every new talent fills me with inexpressible joy: I rejoice in every literary achievement, and I never feel the slightest envy.

On the contrary, my nature demands authority, what Carlyle calls heroes, and a need for worship—and since there are no real heroes, I worship little idols created by those who are near me and whom I trust and respect.”

The need for authority and heroes exists in every era, but in this era, especially in Russia, this trend is even more prevalent.

Panaev and his companions certainly had no ill intentions, and they even praised Dostoevsky without reservation in various salons and gatherings, thus making the young Dostoevsky's reputation spread further and louder.

At present, in the cultural circles of St. Petersburg, more and more people believe that the young Dostoevsky will be another rising star after Mikhail.

Lao Tuo's works are indeed worthy of such fame, but Lao Tuo himself is somewhat unable to bear such fame. On the one hand, he feels a little inferior in upper-class gatherings, and on the other hand, he is proud of his literary talent, which makes him sometimes arrogant.

At the same time, Lao Tu was indeed becoming more and more immersed in this fame, and began to accept invitations from others or to participate in various salons and gatherings on his own initiative. However, this is also a common problem among young people in Russia today, and Lao Tu also has this problem.

I can only say that at this age, a person's personality has basically been formed. As his reputation becomes more and more famous, Lao Tuo also becomes more and more fond of pretending.
Fortunately, Mikhail felt a little relieved. Perhaps it was because his reputation was greater than Lao Tuo's at the moment, and he showed an unusually humble attitude. This made Lao Tuo start to show off, but he didn't pretend to be so cruel.

And perhaps it was because Mikhail's success in the gamble made Lao Tuo respect him. In short, Lao Tuo was pretending, but when faced with Mikhail's opinions and reminders, he was more or less restrained.

How should I put it? It's ok. At least Lao Tuo may not be ostracized by others because of pretending to be too tough.
But then again, why do I feel like Lao Tuo is observing me lately?

Could it be that he wants to learn from my attitude in this regard?

That's great.
Perhaps the letter recently written by the young Dostoyevsky can answer Mikhail's thoughts and doubts:
"To M. M. Dostoyevsky
I am writing to you in a hurry because I have very little time. You can hardly imagine what I have been through during this period. I have been met with incredible respect and great curiosity about me.

I made the acquaintance of many distinguished people, and Prince Odoevsky asked me to condescend to teach him, to the great dismay of Count Sologub, to whom Panayev told me of a versatile writer who would crush everyone except Mikhail.

Count Sologub, after asking everyone, came to Kraevsky and suddenly asked him, "Who is this Dostoevsky? Where can I get Dostoevsky?" Kraevsky replied that Dostoevsky was unwilling to honor you! This was indeed the case.
I also want to tell you one more thing, brother. You have no idea how many miracles there are in Mikhail. The more I understand him, the more I am in awe of him.

Recently, in order to learn something from him, I have been observing what he usually does and making a simple record. I will tell you briefly here:
On Friday the 16th, Mikhail played cards with some people at Panayev's house for half a day, but in the end, no one wanted to play with him anymore!

On the 23rd, Friday, Mikhail was still playing cards, and this time he seemed to be deliberately losing some money, which made Vissarion very excited.
Saturday, the 24th. Mikhail is still playing cards! I doubt he'll play cards again at the next party.
So far, I haven't seen anything special from it, but I believe I will find out sooner or later. Maybe playing cards is beneficial to the development of intelligence? I think I should give it a try. Recently, I have been immersed in various honors and have little time to play cards.

But next time we get together, I might play it seriously for a while."

(End of this chapter)