EVA: Shinji Ikari Returns from Tiga

Chapter 62 Thank you, Ali
“…It’s fine now, thank you…”

In the darkness, Asuka lay lightly on Rei Ayanami's legs, in a trance for who knows how long... Finally, she regained some strength and stood up slightly weakly.

"Is that okay?"

Rei Ayanami asked gently... From the beginning, she let Asuka snuggle up to her, and later when she got tired of standing, she simply sat on the ground and let Asuka rest her head on her thighs...

This was clearly the first time she had done something for someone else...neither Commander Ikari nor Ikari-kun had ever experienced it, but Ayanami was surprisingly not averse to it.

Asuka... the second qualified candidate... before, I just treated her as someone who had nothing to do with me... She also really disliked me, so I never thought about getting along with her.

But - when I was really so close to her... and could actually feel the girl's subtle breathing, an inexplicable pity rose in my heart.

—Is it because I've fulfilled the request Ikari-kun gave me... or is it that, while living with Ikari-kun, Asuka, and Misato-san... I've actually developed feelings for someone other than Ikari-kun and Commander Ikari...

"It's okay to lie down for a while..."

When she came to her senses, Ayanami realized that she had actually spoken first... indicating that Asuka could rest for a while longer.

"It's okay... No need, the power has been out for more than 20 minutes... That idiot hasn't come back yet, we can't just wait here..."

Even Asuka herself couldn't figure out why she felt so panicked. She should have been used to the darkness and loneliness by now.

But the darkness of this NERV base seemed different from everywhere else… Normally, NERV was brightly lit, maintaining a sense of technology ahead of its time, and that was fine… But when that flicker of civilization went out… Asuka's deepest fear was instantly awakened, robbing her of the strength to move.

Damn it, what’s wrong with me… How can I be so useless!?

"Be careful."

"what…"

Asuka had just taken a step forward when Ayanami Rei took the initiative to step forward and held Asuka's hand... Such intimate behavior made Asuka feel very uncomfortable... But then she thought, she had been snuggling up to the First Qualified Person for more than ten minutes... Now it was just holding hands, there was no need to be so pretentious.

So he didn't struggle, but obediently let Rei Ayanami support him and walked in the direction where Shinji Ikari left.

"… Let's go to the staff lounge first. There shouldn't be any electric doors along the way; they're all just push-open doors."

"Ah."

Originally, Ikari Shinji didn't ask them to stay here and not move around freely, he just asked them to take care of Asuka... Since Ikari-kun didn't forbid it, Ayanami naturally wouldn't object to Asuka's proposal.

"Also, we need some water."

Since the air conditioner was completely shut down, the temperature inside was estimated to be 30 degrees. Even the combat uniform with excellent breathability was already covered with sweat... If this was not a public place, Asuka really wanted to take off the combat uniform and wipe her body thoroughly.
…The feeling of sweat sticking to my skin from this special material that's neither cloth nor rubber is quite uncomfortable.

“…Why, do this?”

The two walked hand in hand in the darkness. Perhaps unable to endure the darkness and silence, the fear in Asuka's heart was amplified infinitely...

In order to break the dead silence... and at the same time to sense her presence, Asuka took the initiative to talk - ah, at this time... Asuka finally understood... why Ayanami Rei held her hand just now.

If I can't feel the other person through their body temperature, and I'm left alone in this darkness... I'll probably feel even more uneasy.

"These?"

Ayanami's voice sounded a little confused, and she didn't sound like she was pretending to be stupid, but really didn't know what Asuka was referring to.

"Just now, and now..."

Asuka shyly shook their clasped hands... and the hug, the snuggle, and the lap pillow just now... She was not in a good mental state and did not react, but now she thinks about it, she is so embarrassed.

"Shouldn't you hate me? After all... my attitude towards you before was so bad..."

Asuka is aware of her rejection of Ayanami Rei... Before Shinji Ikari came, as the second qualified person, she was full of jealousy and resentment towards Ayanami Rei, who was the first qualified person and had a very close relationship with Ikari Gendo...

Even her pursuit of Kaji Ryoji was partly due to the special relationship between Ayanami Rei and Ikari Gendo, and she also wanted to find a man who held a high position in the organization.

"Asuka...I don't hate it."

"Is that so...Come to think of it, you've started calling me by my first name too."

Before, I always called her by her second name... although there was also a reason why I didn't call her name properly.

"Um... Because, Asuka called my name. So... no?"

"No... you're allowed to scream. Thank me."

"Um...thanks, Asuka."

Incredibly, even though she was just holding hands with Rei Ayanami and chatting casually, Asuka could feel the inexplicable fear that had been gripping her body disappear without a trace. Even her mental state had returned to a state where she could still joke. "Really? He left these two girls behind and disappeared all by himself, saying he was going to find out what was going on. Where did he go?"

The topic ended and Asuka was surrounded by silence again, so she could only talk about Shinji Ikari for fun.

"Because, Ikari-kun... asked me to take care of Asuka. So, it's okay."

“Eh? …Yes, that’s right.”

The moment she heard these words, an unimaginable bitterness surged up from deep within Asuka's heart... Even her hand, which was held by both of them, loosened... But Rei Ayanami didn't let go, and it was Rei Ayanami who was holding Asuka's hand unilaterally.

So that's it... No wonder she was hugging and holding hands... It turned out it was because of Shinji Ikari's request... Tsk, why did she ask her to take care of me instead of asking me to take care of her!

Asuka certainly knew the answer to this question. When darkness suddenly descended... she was filled with fear and anxiety. Naturally, she could only be cared for by others rather than caring for others, but -

Shinji Ikari trusts Rei Ayanami more than himself... The moment this dark thought emerged, it could no longer be eliminated... and a shadow was cast over Rei Ayanami's pure kindness.

Ahh, how annoying—

It’s so annoying, so annoying, so annoying, so annoying!

I felt disgusted inside... both towards Ayanami Rei and myself...

"Asuka...?"

Rei Ayanami, who was unaware of Asuka's inner changes, felt Asuka's hand loosen and looked at her with some confusion.

"…I…!"

He bit his lip, feeling increasingly disgusted, and wanted to shake off Rei Ayanami's hand. She was the reliable and warm presence that had saved him from fear just a second ago... but now she had become as disgusting as filth.

Ahhh… I hate it, I hate it… I am like this—

The uncontrollable impulse, the urge to rudely shake off her hand, the urge to hurt her heart with words, the urge to... mess up everything that was originally starting to get better.

Just before the porcupine was about to sting the tender embrace she was in—

[Unquenchable, enthusiastic heart. Compassion for others, helping each other]

The words I heard not long ago, ignited in my heart like a torch...dispelling the disgust and rejection that was about to come out of my mouth.

[Don't lose this feeling, even if it has been betrayed thousands of times]

When I first heard it, I just thought it was just nice words...chicken soup for the soul, but I didn't expect...in this situation——

Just thinking of that idiot's words... just thinking of the overly happy smile that appeared on that idiot's face when he said those words...

My heart can calm down so easily... The haze and uneasiness that are as hard to dispel as a cancer attached to the bone can also disappear so easily...

Now, there are more things I need to thank that idiot for—

"It's okay, Ali."

"...!"

Rei Ayanami, who was keenly aware of Asuka's hatred, felt quite uneasy... Maybe she said something wrong.

Unexpectedly, the other party actually squeezed his hand even tighter and responded with a more intimate name.

"Just now... I was really uneasy. Thanks to you... I feel much better now. Thank you, Ali!"

“…!!”

It's unbelievable... Ikari-kun.

It's obvious that I can't see Asuka's expression clearly in the dark... but why, at this moment... I inexplicably know... that she must be smiling very beautifully at this moment?
This is unbelievable... Commander Ikari.

I've heard you say before that people can never understand each other... Until now, I have believed your words, Commander.

But now... I'm - starting to doubt it.

Another chapter full of literary drama

Some people always say that there is nothing interesting to write about the plot of EVA. I really can't understand it.

Doesn't it take thousands or tens of thousands of words to describe just the growth of a character? (Music)
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(End of this chapter)