Who let this Dementor into Hogwarts!

Chapter 97: The Quibbler's True Report on Dementors
Luna laughed for several minutes before she stopped, but Cohen didn't think what he said was funny at all - maybe it was a little funny at the time, but when the person sitting opposite you laughs for a few minutes, even the most interesting joke will become boring.

Cohen started reading, but this time it was Lockhart's Wandering with Werewolves.

After all, he had already spent money. If he didn't even take a look at it, Cohen might as well use magic to change the cover of other books to this one.

In fact, if you look at it from the perspective of an adventure story, Lockhart's autobiography is actually quite time-killing. He is really good at making the plot ups and downs - Lockhart should go to China in the 21st century to write online articles instead of being a dangerous Defense Against the Dark Arts professor at Hogwarts.

As Cohen was reading about a small village in Armenia being attacked for the seventh time by a elusive werewolf, he wanted to stretch his stiff neck.

He noticed that Luna, who was sitting opposite him, was also reading something.

It was a newspaper, The Quibbler, a wizarding tabloid edited and published by Luna's father, full of bizarre articles.

An extremely eye-catching article title in the back of the magazine caught Cohen's attention, even more attractive than the "impossible magic" about lifting the werewolf curse in "Wandering with Werewolves".

Are Dementors Really Evil Creatures? The Truth, Goodness, and Beauty Beneath the Cloak...

What?! Who has such good taste? They can even understand the unity and friendship of Dementors...

"This newspaper is quite interesting - can you lend it to me to take a look?" Cohen asked Luna curiously - although he knew that most of the newspaper contained counterintuitive and bizarre gimmicks, since it involved racial reputation, Cohen had reasons to read it.

"Great!" Luna was very happy that her father's newspaper was popular and Cohen looked very interesting.

After taking the newspaper, Cohen followed the page numbers marked on the cover to find the report about Dementors.

[Dementors—Are They Really “Unforgivable”?]

[The terrifying murderous monster may very well be a kind and friendly magical creature! ]

Cohen was a little nervous - that would be fine if he had written the article, but the author was named "Xenophilius Lovegood".

[For hundreds of years, Dementors, as the jailers of Azkaban, were often dubbed "murderers without blinking an eye" (they have no eyes) and "soul eaters."]

【But is this really the case? 】

[Recently, surprising new evidence has emerged that suggests Dementors may not be as ruthless and terrifying as people imagine. According to Ned O'Connor, an elderly man living alone on the Isles of Scilly in Cornwall, he encountered a Dementor in 1987. It did not harm him - and for the next three months, it brought him back some gold galleons and small toys every month.]

“People have such a deep misunderstanding of Dementors. I don’t think the Ministry of Magic wants us to have too much affection for our jailers,” Mr. O’Connor said. “That little Dementor didn’t hurt me at all. It was building sandcastles on the beach like a child – I thought it was just a homeless child at the time. After I confirmed that it was actually a Dementor, I even brought two bottles of joy potion to prevent it from sucking away my happiness. But it didn’t have any thoughts about my happiness at all. It looked at me, then at the sandcastle, and quickly ran away. Every month since then, I’ve found a few new gold Galleons or some children’s toys in that place. I’ve written to the Minister of Magic, hoping that he can pay attention to the needs of the Dementor community as soon as possible and stop letting those lonely little Dementors wander around.”

Weird, so fucking weird.

Even Dementors have never seen such an article. No wonder "The Quibbler" is considered "useless garbage" by normal people.

"I like this report too," Luna said. "No matter what species, they all have a friendly side—they also have friends and family. It's a pity that we can't see them on a normal day..."

"Dementors do have a friendly side..." Coin said, which made Luna very happy.

"But I don't recommend rashly contacting Dementors. They're equally dangerous," Cohen continued. "Not every Dementor is as harmless as the one in this report. You need to master some means of communication, just like you can't safely enter a merman's territory without understanding the merman language."

Afterwards, Luna enthusiastically discussed with Cohen the living habits of Dementors and the language they spoke.

She really asked the right person.

"You're a walking Dementor!"

Luna said in a happy tone.

She obviously didn't understand that her words would have a different meaning in the ears of others.

"Ha, thank you for the compliment. Don't compliment me next time." Cohen thanked him with some difficulty.

The more he thought about it, the more he felt that the "Dementor" seen by Ned O'Connor, the interviewee of this report, was the little Dementor Mick in his horned camel skin pocket.

Did this allow Mr. Lovegood to interview the real story?
Halfway through, the Count woke up and complained about Cohen's summer homework for ten minutes - and Luna didn't seem too surprised that the owl could talk.

"Animals can all talk. Perhaps your owl is smarter and has learned human language." Luna said softly, "I really wish I could have one so I can have a friend when I'm at home."

"I like this sweet-talking little girl," the Count said resentfully. "Could you please praise her a little more? Could you please give me a little more pleasure?"

But Luna didn't continue praising him—that made the Count extremely uncomfortable.

After a few minutes of silence, it was too lazy to pretend to be a fairy-tale owl in front of Luna, so it revealed its true form and asked Cohen for a drink.

"Are you a sophomore?" Luna didn't ask about Cohen's grade until the train was about to arrive. "What will the Hogwarts Sorting ceremony be like? Dad said that we have to have a dream, and whichever animal appears in the dream will determine which house we will be sorted into. I like rabbits, but Hogwarts doesn't have a house with a rabbit totem..." (It's a mysterious tradition at Hogwarts that parents never tell their children what the Sorting ceremony will be like)

"There's no college with an owl totem." The Earl burped. "I guess you'll be sorted into Ravenclaw. Eagles love to catch rabbits and eat them."

"Extraordinary intelligence and talent are mankind's greatest wealth," Luna said in a sing-song voice. "My parents are both from this academy. Thank you for your blessing, Mr. Magical Owl."

"Grandma, you should learn from her!"

The Count turned around and lectured Cohen, his voice full of alcohol.

But Cohen only needed to sober it up with a look.

(End of this chapter)