I'm not a literary giant

Chapter 251 A Solo Pilgrimage (Thanks to TKsama for the patronage)
An Younan's collarbone was wrapped in a thick white bath towel, loosely tied in a knot at her chest, revealing her two shapely long legs without any cover, which gleamed under the dim light.

She crouched down, her dark eyes fixed intently on Prince Xu, as if staring at a rare creature that had strayed into her territory and was behaving strangely.

The prince's legs went weak, and he almost slipped into the pool.

"What are you doing here?!" He was so frightened that his voice changed.

"Soaking in a hot spring," An Younan said slowly as she stood up, "It's nothing to make a fuss about."

She reached up to her shoulders, as if to untie the towel beneath them. Prince Xuzhen plummeted straight into the water like an axe.

A smooth toe reached out first, gently touching the water, and then there was a "plop." The splashing water pushed the prince, who had just emerged from the water, making him stumble. He couldn't help but open his eyes, and An Younan was swimming past him like a nimble fish.

"What are you pretending to be so righteous about? Are you afraid I'm not wearing any clothes? Please, this isn't a private hot spring, everyone here is wearing swimsuits!" She stopped, turned around, and water droplets slid down her smooth neck.

She was indeed wearing a swimsuit—a sky-blue bikini with delicate straps tied in a bow at the back of her neck, making her neck appear exceptionally long and graceful.

Prince Xu, with only his head above water, looked like a frightened kappa, his face flushed, and he tried to save face by saying:

"Mainly...mainly, when I left, I saw you chatting happily with those people from the Xihe Literary Association...I didn't expect you to come along to soak in the hot springs."

“Aren’t you also a member of the Xihe Literary Association?” An Younan reached out and stirred the water, carefully stepping on the water in the pool, creating ripples. “It seems you haven’t truly considered yourself one of them yet.”

Wang Zixu remained silent. Seeing his somber expression, An Younan waved her hand, splashing water: "Hey, I was just saying it casually, and you're actually starting to reflect deeply?"

Wang Zixu said in a muffled voice, "I'm wondering if my personality has unintentionally offended a lot of people."

An Younan floated on her back on the water, the gentle waves cradling her: "You did offend me, but not because of your personality. I think you're not arrogant enough; it would be better if you were even more arrogant."

Wang Zixu had considered himself to be "unsociable," "isolated," and even used more extreme words to describe himself, but he never imagined it would be "arrogant." He pointed incredulously at himself: "Me? Arrogant?"

"Otherwise what?" An Younan glanced at him indifferently, then gracefully turned to face him. "Do you know what they were saying about you when I left?"

"What did you say about me?"

"Seeing you is like seeing Jesus."

An Younan nimbly pushed off the pool wall and swam away like a mermaid, leaving Wang Zixu standing there in astonishment.

This praise was ridiculously high, far exceeding the bounds of flattery, making him wonder if it contained a sinister satire.

An Younan's voice came from a distance: "Do you know what it means to say you're like Jesus? It means you're not human. You have no background or connections, and you finally stumbled upon a massive amount of traffic, but instead of seizing the opportunity to monetize it, you put on a pure pilgrim's posture, as if you're truly doing this for justice. If you're not God, then you're insane."

Prince Xu was both surprised and angry. He stood up and retorted, "Am I wrong for not showing myself?"

“You’re not wrong,” An Younan said nonchalantly, splashing in the water. “But in their eyes, you’re just an idiot. Being aloof is a privilege reserved for people like Shi Tonghe and Gu Zao. You’re nothing, you don’t have the right to be aloof. In their eyes, you’re just a fake aloof.”

Prince Xu remained silent for a moment, then finally sighed: "So what if they're idiots? In my eyes, they're nothing more than rotten rats."

"Speak something I can understand."

"A dog occupying a pile of cow dung."

"Pfft!" An Younan burst into loud laughter, exclaiming, "I love this!"

After laughing, she wiped away the tears that had welled up with her fingers, slowly swam closer, and gently placed her hand on his chest through the warm pool water:
"Gu Zao spoke highly of your 'Fire in the Stone.' After we parted by the river that time, I made a special trip to read it. Would you like to hear my honest opinion?"

"Appreciate further details."

“It’s devoid of humanity, like Jesus,” An Younan said earnestly. “It’s truly amazing, almost like a centenarian recounting it in person, incredibly vivid. It’s hard to imagine that humans could grasp such a vast story so precisely; the text shimmers with a wondrous divinity.”

"But precisely because of this, it feels inhuman to me. I can't feel you in this book, I can't feel the desires, passions, and impulses of Prince Xu, like a devout saint who stripped himself of his human emotions in exchange for the qualification to become a god."

This assessment surprised Prince Xu, but he did not object to it; instead, it sparked a discussion: "I believe that imitating God is an instinct of every human being."

An Younan shook her head: "But I don't like it. Especially when I know you are the Little Prince. Compared to Prince Xu who wrote 'Spark in the Stone,' I prefer The Little Prince. Although it is not considered highbrow by the world, I am obsessed with the domineering, wild, animalistic vitality that he expresses on paper. They move me more."

Her hand, stroking his skin, carried the warmth of the lukewarm water: "The prince imprisoned his desires, fearing the destructive power of that beast. But the 'Little Prince' unleashed them, tearing apart all restraints and displaying astonishing primal strength. I'm fascinated by that sense of power, because of power—"

Her eyes gleamed with an almost fanatical light as she stared at him, as if gazing upon her king: "—This is the reason to become 'king'!"

Looking into those eyes burning with ambition, Prince Xu felt a sudden fear rise in his heart. He finally understood the source of the woman's sinister allure—her frank and unburdened embrace of her desires and thirst for power was the absolute opposite of his own.

He cleared his throat, trying to cover up his misunderstanding, and pushed her hand away from his chest: "You can say whatever you want, but don't touch me like that."

An Younan was rolling her eyes at him when a sour, chilling voice suddenly rang out behind them:
"You two certainly know how to pick a place to express your love!"

Prince Xu turned around and felt a stream of icy water poured down his head, while the scalding hot spring water under his feet surged upwards. The two completely opposite temperatures were fiercely battling near his chest, and the skin that An Younan had just touched instantly developed a layer of fine goosebumps.

Ning Chunyan stood by the pool, a towel tied around her waist, her fierce gaze like two small flying knives, firmly fixed on him; Chen Qingluo stood beside her, her jet-black hair tied into a neat high ponytail, revealing her smooth forehead and graceful neck. Her fair, almost transparent face showed no emotion, only her hands clenched tightly in front of her chest betrayed a hint of inner turmoil.

Their figures stood out conspicuously in the misty steam, but Wang Zixu's heart was pounding because he had just been talking at length with An Younan about the little prince—

How much did they hear? Was his carefully concealed disguise completely torn away right here beside the steamy hot spring? Exposed to Chen Qingluo? The thought filled him with a suffocating panic.

"I knew something was wrong when I couldn't find you two inside. Turns out you both sneaked out here." Ning Chunyan stood with her hands on her hips, her gaze piercing the two men like knives. "Wang Zixu, what else do you have to say?"

An Younan splashed in the water as she swam to the edge of the pool, tilting her head back to retort, "Well, you two scheming women! You were eavesdropping on our conversation!" Ning Chunyan laughed angrily, "Who are you calling a scheming woman?!"

"I'm talking about you!" An Younan pointed at Ning Chunyan's chest. "Wearing a deep V swimsuit that makes your chest look bigger is just too obvious, isn't it?"

As a fellow motorcycle enthusiast who often goes to spas together, An Younan knows her figure inside and out, making his attacks even more lethal.

Ning Chunyan's face flushed instantly, and she stomped her foot in anger: "The counter only sells a few styles! This is the only one that fits! Do you think I want to wear it?!"

Prince Xu timidly reminded him from the side: "Don't fall into the trap of self-proof..."

"you shut up!"

After a while, Ning Chunyan calmed down.

"Didn't you say before that you were going to be honest with us? There's no one here, so just be honest here."

Prince Xu's gaze pierced through the rising white mist, aiming futilely at the deep end of the hot spring pavilion: "Are you sure no one's here?"

“Half of them went to play mahjong, and the other half went for massages.” Ning Chunyan’s lips curled into a slightly sarcastic smile. “Shen Qingfeng hired a group of top-notch technicians with triple pay. Their average age is less than 25. I’m pretty sure that no one else will show up here within half an hour.”

Prince Xu was taken aback: "Massage therapists? They're doing this during the Chinese New Year?..."

"Don't get the wrong idea, it's just a simple massage. At their age, even if they wanted to do something bad, they wouldn't have the energy."

After she finished speaking, she noticed that Prince Xu was looking at her with a complicated expression. She then said, "Why are you looking at me? Do you think I spoke harshly? They're even more ruthless when they talk about you behind your back."

Prince Xu asked, "What did they say about me?"

Ning Chunyan didn't answer immediately. She raised her hand and gathered her loose hair back together, seemingly preparing to go into the water, but first pointed at Wang Zixu and ordered, "Turn around."

An Younan immediately scoffed: "What? You're dressed like this and you're afraid of men seeing you?"

Wang Zixu did not argue, but simply responded with a soft "Oh," and then obediently swam to the edge of the pool and faced the wall.

He needed this moment to catch his breath. Chen Qingluo was so close, and he was afraid that if his gaze fell on her, he would be glued to her and never be able to look away. His heart was pounding wildly in his chest, and his body was stiff and aching. Not having to face Chen Qingluo anymore was a relief for him.

He felt the water ripple behind him; it was the sound of two people untying their towels and stepping into the pool. The force of the water gently pushed him against the pool wall. He stood stiffly, not daring to turn around.

"Speak," Ning Chunyan's voice sounded from behind, closer than expected. "What exactly is this 'hidden story' you mentioned?"

“An Younan… is my half-sister, sharing the same mother but a different father,” Wang Zixu said.

There was a strange sense of shame in recounting his most secret life story with his back to the people, like confessing a crime in court. But he continued anyway.

From the visit to An Younan's home to Ms. An Huilan's visit, and then to the agreement reached between the two in private, going back further to the chaotic beginning of the millennium, how Ms. An left his home to make a living in Donghai, and how he and Comrade Wang Jianguo were inseparable...

It took Prince Xu a long time to accept this reality. He originally thought that confessing would require all his courage, but when he actually said it, those heavy memories seemed to find a floodgate, bringing a kind of almost exhausting joy.

Perhaps it's because he has truly grown up, no longer the unwanted, uncared-for child who cowered in a corner. That child simply remained hidden deep within his heart, serving as a seed of subconscious inferiority.

The lengthy narration ended, followed by a long silence. Steam filled the air, broken only by the soft gurgling of flowing water. Prince Xu couldn't resist turning to see their reaction, but before he could even move his neck, Ning Chunyan's urgent voice rang out:
"Don't turn around!"

Prince Xu paused: "...What's wrong?"

"Don't look this way," Ning Chunyan said, her voice strained and nasal, "...it's not pretty."

An Younan chimed in with a hint of schadenfreude: "Your editor-in-chief, Ning, cried her eyes out after hearing your story, and her makeup was ruined!"

Ning Chunyan immediately retorted, "I didn't feel sorry for you, I just felt... you've suffered too much... I was a bit too harsh on you when I said those things about you before."

An Younan sneered: "And what about me? What about all those harsh words you said before?"

"To you?" Ning Chunyan sniffed, her tone instantly turning cold. "I don't think that's harsh enough."

At this moment, Chen Qingluo, who had been silent all along, spoke. Her voice was very soft, but it was like a pebble thrown into a calm pond.

“Turn around,” she paused, then added, “you can see our swimsuits.”

Prince Xu's heart pounded again.

Neither of the two women had any objections to Chen Qingluo's authoritative declaration. It was indeed strange to speak with one's back turned, so Wang Zixu slowly turned around.

The misty water flowed like a thin veil, blurring part of the vision, but adding a layer of hazy poetry and breathtaking realism to the scene before us.

The three were within his reach. Ning Chunyan's deep sapphire blue swimsuit accentuated her snow-white skin, and the curves beneath the deep V-neckline appeared slightly disheveled. Her eyes were slightly red, adding a touch of brokenness to her delicate face.

Standing a step away from her, Chen Qingluo wore a conservative dark swimsuit that, like the night enveloping the mountains, outlined her undulating curves, full yet understated. Her high black ponytail, just like in high school, fully revealed her delicate face, like a piece of white porcelain moistened by moisture.

Her gaze was no longer unfocused and wandering, but slightly raised, looking at him earnestly and attentively. There was no blame or pity in her eyes, only a deep and complex emotion that seemed to see into the core of his soul.

Seeing her eyes, Prince Xu suddenly felt an unprecedented peace and joy. He suddenly realized that his sincere confession was an excellent choice, because he had already received a reward.

(End of this chapter)