The Secret Code of Monsters.

Chapter 1148 (Ch.1147) The Silent Orator
Fernandez was not lying.

He didn't actually apologize to Gilles Fonseca—he had intended to do so the night the woman was admitted to the ward.

But Gilles Fonseca stopped him.

'This isn't your fault, Fernandez.'

'No, Gilles, I should…maybe…maybe sooner…'

He lay on his back on the hospital bed, the moonlight cutting through his flesh like frost from a snow-capped peak.

Gilles laughed out loud once again at his 'stupidity'.

'If they threaten me, saying they'll trade Deloz's life for your future... Fernandez, guess what I'll do.'

Deloz Fonseca.

Her sister.

Fernandez muttered, "I guess you'll have to fight tooth and nail for your sister..."

"Pretty much. In my opinion, neither your life nor mine is as important as Delos's—will saying this make you sad?"

The hospital beds were only a few feet apart.

The man turned over and faced the woman gazing at the silver moon outside the window.

'What? No! Of course not! Fonseca. That's your sister, and I know perfectly well how much you've sacrificed for her.'

Yes.

Fonseca slowly turned around as well.

Her face.

That land, which should have been blessed, was once again bathed in sunlight that may never have faded.

She was not 'holy', yet she brought Fernandez such peace and beauty.

A love that is neither new nor old, and that brings eternal tranquility.

Everyone has something they're willing to give everything for…like my Delos, like your faith…or justice? Forgive my ignorance, Fernandez. I never considered it your "mistake"—and the price I paid to uphold you was something I "had to pay" for…

'As your lover…'

She is like a roaring ocean being gradually unfurled, awaiting an unknown storm... or a true sunrise.

'Can I still say that now?'

In the hazy moonlight.

A pair of expectant, almost lifeless eyes.

No time in Fernandez’s life had he felt the fear of losing someone more than that moment.

He longed to become a giant and use his breath to disperse the storm that had accumulated calamities.

Perhaps it only takes one sentence.

'You always will, Gilles.'

…………

……

"So, it's like you did absolutely nothing?" Roland scratched his leg, looking disdainful. "It was all initiated by Ms. Fonseca?"

Fernandez, somewhat embarrassed, stubbornly argued, "I also said 'forever'."

Roland clapped his hands twice: "Yes, you're really amazing."

Rose hid behind Roland and chuckled.

He couldn't hide a single laugh.

Fernandez's face flushed red, and he gasped for breath, but then, like a punctured balloon, all the breaths leaked out of his nostrils.

“…I don’t know, Roland.”

He rubbed the wrinkles in his hospital gown at the knees, staring at the gleaming floor.

"Is it my fault, or the fault of faith...?"

This rat infestation caused enormous disaster for London—and at the same time, it shook the faith that some believers thought was firm.

Especially the Holy Cross.

Especially the courtroom.

Mr. Fernandes Devinson.

The flesh-and-blood cradle is the enemy, just as a fork and a spoon are.

I wish it were branded on my heart from childhood; everyone knows what it is. But today...

But they want to transform themselves into the orthodox religion…

Before long, you'll see these people preaching everywhere on the streets.

Fernandez couldn’t accept this, and after Gilles Fonseca’s suffering, he began to question whether he was being too paranoid.

He wavered, like a reed in the wind.

When orators are speechless, they usually draw a dagger from their waist.

Fernandez is looking for his dagger.

“I don’t know either, Fernandez. But to be honest: if it were me, I would have to go back and forth to avenge my lover.”

Fernandez glanced sideways: "'Back and forth,' you really should hire a teacher to teach you."

Shandel wholeheartedly agreed: "Please, we have another girl here who needs to go to school..."

Rose crushed someone's flesh with her two fingernails.

—In Sender’s view, Fernandez’s confusion was indeed worthy of Enid’s high regard for him.

This is a person with faith, a steadfast faith... though not necessarily a 'Holy Cross'.

But otherwise, there is absolutely no possibility of 'pain'.

He wasn't entirely as he claimed, staying in the courtroom only because of Enid.

"...They even sent people to find Gilles, believing she possessed the 'qualification' to return to the embrace of her brothers and sisters...I...I don't know, Roland. Perhaps, it's time to end my mission..."

“Piety is outside the church,” Sender suddenly said.

Her unusually dignified and serious demeanor was astonishing, just as Fernandez had never imagined how a girl who was truly 'one step away from becoming a saint' could stand out in the selection process—and today he had witnessed it.

"Faith is an inescapable desire, Mr. Devinson. When you stroll after a refreshing rain, walk with Ms. Fonseca across the lakeside lawn, sit down in a quiet tavern, and kiss each other under the moonlight—if this inescapable desire deep within your heart cannot be dispelled in the mundane happiness of daily life…"

"You won't be the only one suffering."

Sender's eyes are like a mirror; the once romantic and innocent lake-blue surface now reflects Fernandes de Winson's own cowardice and fear.

The sunlight in his heart was broken by the cracks in the plank, but the sun will never be ashamed of it.

Why don't you tell me?

The sound came from the corridor.

Gilles Fonseca stood in the doorway holding a tray.

On the tray were several teacups with water droplets, a steaming kettle, and a few dripping apples.

She came in, put down the tray, and sat down against Fernandez.

I used my soft palm to partially cover the stupid bear's clenched fist.

“…I am a believer, Gilles. All suffering and torment are trials that believers must undergo…” he murmured to himself, almost veer back to the Book of Eden.

Gilles was certainly not a believer in any god.

The only thing she prayed for them was for Deloz Fonseca to be safe and healthy.

“But those who love you would never want you to suffer. Does God love you?” Gilles whispered.

If He loves you, He shouldn't watch you suffer.

If not, then would you still love Him?

This is undoubtedly a superficial understanding of faith and blasphemous.

But today, Fernandez no longer has the heart to sternly reprimand.

He turned to Roland, hoping to hear what his former adjutant would have to say.

Then I saw a hamster hugging an apple and munching on it.

"...Roland."

“Hmm? I agree with everything, Fernandez. I think that someone as dull and uninteresting as you will inevitably head towards an even more uninteresting future, no matter what choices you make… I don’t like stories that are boring.”

He chewed on the fruit, his frosty voice accompanied by the icy shards of frozen apple juice.

“I understand your anger,” Fernandez sighed.

He thought Roland was angry about his choice.

“I don’t understand your understanding,” Roland chuckled. “Go talk to Enid, talk to her face to face. You have to face your own judge eventually.”

(End of this chapter)