It's a hell game, who can still be a human being?

Chapter 653 Say Goodbye to Your Sphincter!

"Oh!"

Liu Zheng lowered his back and sat on the horse, managing to catch the sea bream.

Fortunately, he was strengthened by the divine essence, otherwise he would have been sent flying.

Name: Ebisu-gami's Extra-Large Taiyaki

Type: Item

Quality: Excellent

"Effect: Your luck will be greatly increased the next time you use an item or skill."

Note: Can you handle this overwhelming wealth?

"Can it be taken out of the instance: Yes"

"hehe."

Liu Zheng looked at the notes on the items, and the corner of his mouth twitched slightly.

He could accept the offer, but he couldn't eat it.

Such a large piece of hardwood would be difficult for even a real black goat cub to eat, let alone someone who is just a hybrid.

"Thank you for the gift, Ebisu-sama."

Liu Zhengchao bowed three more times to the statue of Ebisu.

Regardless, the product is indeed of good quality and reasonably priced, making it worth buying.

After the attendants had also paid their respects to the Ebisu statue, the group left the torii gate and returned to the men's bath.

"Can you even work like this?"

Liu Zheng looked at their limp and weak appearance and said.

"It's alright, Zhengjiang. You just need to rest for a while."

"I can't help but say it," Sumireko said, forcing herself to stay calm.

As the host, she expended the most energy.

"Then let's just take a day off. What's the daily revenue of Yakudo Sentang?"

Liu Zheng asked.

“Zhengjiang, this isn’t about money. Working at the public bathhouse is both a means of making a living and a way of self-cultivation for us. Closing down would be bad for us.”

Jinzi shook her head.

"Okay. So, if more guests come, will it be beneficial for you?"

"Of course. But it has to be that the guest comes willingly."

Sumireko emphasized.

She knew this man well; sometimes he was soft-hearted, and sometimes he was hard-hearted. He was absolutely capable of forcing others to spend money at the bathhouse.

"Don't worry, am I the kind of person who forces people to buy things? How much customer traffic can you handle?"

Liu Zheng asked.

"We'll take as many people as they come; at worst, I'll bring in people from the tribe."

"Issue said boldly."

"You don't mean 'eat' in the literal sense, do you?"

He squinted and said.

Liu Zhengke remembered that Jinzi had initially planned to trick him.

"Ugh, why is Masashi so vengeful?"

Jinzi playfully punched him with her little fist.

"Don't worry, the customers you introduced, Zhengjiang, definitely won't eat here."

She assured him.

"Okay, I'll bring people over for you right now."

Liu Zheng called the Queen directly.

"Man, have you made all the arrangements?"

"No, but there's something good for you."

He said.

"what's up?"

"The Queen asked."

"I'll treat you to a hot spring and a lavish meal."

Liu Zheng said with a grin.

"What do you want us to do for you this time?"

The Queen frowned.

"This is what I need your help with."

He briefly explained the story of the Violet Clan.

"How about it? Free leisure and entertainment, and I even owe you a favor. It's a great deal."

“We have more than a thousand sisters.”

"That's what the Queen said."

"Jinzi, how much is the package deal for washing and eating?"

Liu Zheng tilted his head and asked.

"The group purchase price is 150 yuan."

Sumire thought for a moment and gave a number.

"It's not expensive. Hmm? Wait a minute."

He narrowed his eyes.

"If I remember correctly, the first time I came here, you charged me 150 yuan just for a shower, right?"

"Hee hee~"

Sumire winked mischievously.

"As expected, it's half raw and half cooked, a perfect slam of neither raw nor cooked."

Liu Zheng shook his head and looked away.

"Come on, come on, it's only a few hundred thousand, I can afford it."

He said to the Queen.

“It’s impossible for them all to come. Last time it was just for medical treatment, so we let it go. The prostitutes all went out to enjoy themselves, and those customers and gangs will definitely use that as an excuse to cause trouble.”

"Then let's come in batches. We can go for a follow-up appointment with the doctor after soaking in the hot spring. The hot spring is quite close to the clinic."

Liu Zheng said.

"Okay, I'll make the arrangements."

The Queen was persuaded by him.

"Okay, call me before you leave and I'll arrange for someone to pick you up."

Liu Zheng hung up the phone.

"Here, this money is yours to keep. When someone comes, just give them my name and we'll deduct it directly from your account."

He took out a stack of banknotes and stuffed them into Jinzi's arms.

"Okay, Zhengjiang."

"gone."

He patted Keiko on the shoulder again, then left the Paradise Bathhouse.

"Boss, I'm back again."

Back at the lottery shop, Liu Zheng said casually.

"Actually, you can claim your prize at any lottery shop."

The shop owner said kindly.

"I like to finish what I start, and I don't bother two different people. Since I won the prize here, I'll naturally claim it here too."

He said seriously.

"Hehe. See for yourself."

The shop owner knew he was coming back, so he didn't even change the tablet's interface.

Liu Zheng picked up the tablet and continued to browse the prize catalog.

Soon, he found another suitable prize.

Name: Power Amplifier

Type: Equipment

Quality: Excellent

"Effect: When players use skills related to the Strength attribute, it provides a 25% bonus to the player's Strength attribute, up to a maximum of 20 points."

"Note: Hey old man with glasses, I've had enough of you, come out here!"

"Can it be taken out of the instance: Yes"

It's a very practical effect; with his current stats, it can provide a strength bonus of about 10 points.

Don't be fooled by the seemingly small 10-point bonus; consider that Divine Essence only provides a 20-point bonus across all attributes.

Despite being described as a power amplifier, it looks like a pair of black-rimmed non-prescription glasses.

It just so happens that Liu Zheng is nearsighted in real life. Although his eyesight is now excellent, he is still quite used to wearing it.

"You look like a freak with those glasses on."

"That's what the panda commented."

"This is what you call a handsome man." He took out his phone and looked at himself, quite satisfied with his new appearance.

With those melancholy eyes, simple glasses, delicate features, and a tall, upright figure, he looks every bit the refined and cultured young man.

The bombing maniac and the succubus are all slander and rumors!

He spent another 5 points to exchange for the Power Amplifier, and now he has 21 points left.

Liu Zheng then flipped through the prize catalog and selected three more prizes.

Name: Citizen Walking Shoes

Type: Equipment

Quality: Excellent

"Effect: When a player is a citizen of the Metropolis and within the Metropolis, their movement speed is increased by 25%."

Note: Walk a thousand steps after meals, and you'll live to be nine hundred and ninety!

"Can it be taken out of the instance: No"

With its simple yet powerful effect, 3 points are definitely worth it.

The key point is that he no longer has to walk barefoot!

Name: Metaverse Secure Link Protocol

Type: Miscellaneous Items

Quality: Excellent

"Effect: This item allows you to freely enter and exit the metaverse. If the metaverse suffers fatal damage, it will safely exit and automatically destroy itself."

"Note: Once you use this item to enter the metaverse, your words and actions will be monitored by the City Hall."

"Can it be taken out of the instance: No"

"That's an interesting note."

Liu Zheng seemed to be deep in thought.

Previously, item notes either described their origin, included comments from the maker or owner, or were related jokes. This is the first time I've seen such an obvious note.

But it doesn't matter if I give him a hint, since there's nothing he can't have the city hall monitor anyway.

Anyway, he should have already met the mission requirements. The reason he hasn't settled the dungeon is that he hasn't finished taking care of his affairs, and the other half is because he can't bear to leave this smelly and fragrant metropolis.

Liu Zheng had neither the ambition to dominate the metropolis nor the idea of ​​overthrowing the city hall; at most, he just wanted to vent his anger before leaving.

He was certain he wouldn't do anything illegal or criminal before he decided to settle the account, so he was fearless.

Moreover, he might not even use the item he redeemed for himself.

If those bald monks cause trouble again before he leaves, then Liu Zheng will directly storm into the Yuan Universe and emulate the old story of the Three Martial Sects and One Sect.

If they don't cause trouble, he'll give this item to the female diver before he leaves, essentially leaving her a way out.

Name: Citizen Arm Strengthener

Type: Item

Quality: Excellent

"Effect: After using this item 10,000 times, 20,000 times, and 30,000 times, the player's Strength attribute will increase by 1 point, 2 points, and 4 points respectively. The difficulty of use will also increase with each new stage. Once the Strength attribute has been fully increased, the item will be automatically destroyed."

Note: Friendly reminder: Please do not use your own penis when using the Citizen Arm Exerciser.

"Can it be taken out of the instance: No"

This item can increase strength by a total of 8 points, and also provides an additional 2 points of strength bonus to the strength amplifier, so it's very cost-effective.

But that's it.
Liu Zheng tried using the citizen arm exerciser, and it took both tentacles to fold it completely in half with all their might.

Keep in mind that he now has the attribute bonus from the legendary vest; without that bonus, he would have to use four tentacles.

Even with the legendary vest's enhancement, he could barely manage to use it, and his muscles would ache unbearably after only forty or fifty repetitions.

At this rate, it would take Liu Zheng more than half a year to trigger the first stage effect, not to mention that the difficulty of the second and third stages would increase.

No wonder items with so many added attributes only cost 2 points; so that's what was waiting for him.

"Hmph, too bad, you've run into me."

When the muscles become sore, he cuts them off and they grow back. He cuts off the sore spots wherever they are, rotating the four tentacles in turn, making it possible to use them 24 hours a day without interruption.

Based on an estimated 1200 uses per hour, he could trigger all the effects in a maximum of three days.

"A tiny Ministry of Civil Affairs, how laughable!"

Liu Zheng smiled smugly.

The four prizes – the Power Amplifier, the Citizen Walking Shoes, the Citizen Arm Strengthener, and the Metaverse Secure Link Protocol – would cost a total of 15 points, but he only has 11 bonus points left.

After searching for a long time, he finally found a prize in the corner.

Name: Citizen's Testament Recorder (Disposable)

Type: Item

Quality: Excellent

"Effect: Players can speak their last wishes into the tape recorder, which is triggered upon the player's death. If the player's last wish is beyond the item's ability to fulfill, the wish will be fulfilled in a distorted way."

Note: Friendly reminder, the wish for a perfect resurrection after death is impossible.

"Can it be taken out of the instance: No"

One hundred thousand points is more expensive than the price of the Metaverse Secure Link Protocol.

However, considering that this is essentially a youth version of a wishing machine, it's not too expensive.

Moreover, Liu Zheng already had two lives, so this was a perfect fit.

"I still have 10,000 points, what should I exchange them for?"

He held the tablet and fell into thought.

"If you don't know what to replace, you can replace it next time. Why do you have to replace it all at once?"

"That's what the shop owner said impatiently."

"What's the rush? You don't have any other customers anyway. By the way, boss, do you have any free prizes?"

Liu Zheng asked with a grin.

What were you dreaming about?

"Yin-Yang Qi Array, activate!"

Before the shopkeeper could finish speaking, two small flags, one yin and one yang, emitted golden light and black water that swept towards him.

Before arriving, Liu Zheng had already discussed the process with Panda. Upon hearing the code word, Panda immediately took action.

Moreover, because of the opponent's former special operations team member status, it immediately unleashed its natal magic weapon.

"Um?!"

The shop owner never expected the two of them to fight, but his countless life-or-death struggles still made him react instinctively.

He threw a straight punch, the force of which transformed into a giant golden mace, smashing the golden light and black water together.

"You want to kill me? You're still too green!"

The shop owner shouted and threw out both fists.

One punch transformed into a spear, stabbing towards Liu Zheng; the other punch transformed into a long sword, piercing towards the panda.

"Transforming the essence of fist into form, entering the Dao through martial arts!"

The panda saw through the opponent's methods and exclaimed in surprise.

"You bear have some sense, don't worry, I won't kill you. On the contrary, I'll treat you well, hahaha!"

The shop owner laughed wildly.

He can't compare to these second-generation rich kids in terms of connections or wealth, but when it comes to fighting, he's never been afraid.

What if the forces behind Liu Zheng seek revenge after he kills Liu Zheng?
Between life and death, there's no time to think about anything else; it's either you die or I perish!

The spear, aimed at the throat, first struck a trash can.

"Damn it, why do you have to pick on this damn trash can!"

Amidst angry shouts and curses, a disheveled woman with disheveled hair and clothes crawled out of the trash can, grabbed a bomb, and threw it at the shop owner.

"A mere vengeful spirit dares to challenge me? Solar Fist!"

The shop owner sneered, raised his hands with his five fingers touching, and a blinding light burst forth from his entire body.

"what!"

The old woman let out a piercing scream, and the explosive charge she threw melted away in the bright light.

Liu Zheng squinted, and one tentacle produced a cone-shaped piece of excrement, while the other tentacle produced a pitchfork.

Name: The Power of Three Excrements (Disposable)

Type: Item

Quality: Perfect

"Effect: Creates a large-scale poisonous fog upon use, and all targets within the area with excretory functions will be attacked by resentment."

"Note: It must have been exceptionally foul-smelling feces to have been able to poison the entire family along the way."

"Can it be taken out of the instance: Yes"

Name: Bloodstained Forklift (Disposable)

Type: Equipment/Item

Quality: Excellent

"Effect 1: When attacking a target, it inflicts a small amount of poison damage. When the target is a Witcher, the damage is increased to 300%."

"Effect 2: When used in conjunction with fecal items, it can enhance the poison damage it inflicts or the effects of the fecal items. The extent of the enhancement is related to the quality of the fecal items."

"Note: When you feel ashamed because you are a superhuman but can't beat an ordinary person, remember that a witcher mentor once died from a farmer's pitchfork."

"Can it be taken out of the instance: Yes"

Say goodbye to your sphincter muscles!

With tears streaming down his face, he smiled as he used a pitchfork to poke three of the forces.

(End of this chapter)