first player

Chapter 1331: One Thousand Three Hundred and Twenty-Five·"Su Ming'an is dead."

This was an ordinary gun. Players at the top of the list always had a spare gun in their backpacks. Lu Shu had never thought that he would need a gun at a time like this—to help him stay awake.

Amidst the intense pain, Lu Shu barely managed to regain his soul in the ups and downs.

"Bang!" "Bang!" "Bang!"

It was like being trapped in a dark and endless abyss. No matter how hard I struggled, I couldn't see any light.

He just kept firing instinctively.

do not die.

Don't die, don't die, don't die.

The temperature of his body surface dropped, but quickly rose again. His senses faded, but quickly rose again. He shot himself again and again, the divine nature helping him to quickly repair his body, and the sharp pain helping him to stop the erosion of the divine nature.

Finally, the endless laughter in my ears disappeared.

This was good, as it meant that he was temporarily unaffected by the erosion of his divinity and away from auditory hallucinations.

——Instead, there was his own laugh.

“Haaaaaah, ahhahaha, hahahahahahaha—”

His laughter was disorderly and trembling. His fingers gripped the chains tightly, and his knuckles turned white, as if they were stretched tight like steel bars.

Every breath he took felt like pulling hard on the wound that was hooked by an iron hook. The pain was like a sharp knife piercing his heart, causing his vision to go dark and he almost fainted.

The laughter slowly stopped.

He knew that his mental state was on the verge of collapse, so he laughed out loud for no apparent reason. But in such a frenzy of joy, he actually felt a trace of joy as if by illusion... This feeling was like the embrace of a mother, like the warmth he had long lost, like the first rays of morning light that he saw on his grandfather's tea table when he got up early in the morning to practice swordplay as a child.

Warmth, peace and joy.

But perhaps it should be called the secretion of dopamine.

It turns out that shooting yourself can really give you a sense of happiness.

This happiness made me forget the current situation for a short time and devote myself wholeheartedly to the subtle physical pleasure.

However, soon, a tide of pain came again. This was not only from the body, but also from...what happened today.

……

“——Get out of the way!”

After Lu Shu swallowed the divine power, the black knife glowed with colorful light, and when it was chopped down, the branches and leaves opened up.

He was like a burning fire, rushing forward without looking back.

"Lu Shu, I'll cover you!" Noel ran behind him.

The teammates stood outside the World Tree, anxiously hoping that Lu Shu could successfully rescue Su Mingan.

Looking at the tree trunk that was so close, Lu Shu chopped it off with his sword.

The colorful light burst out, like an invisible giant hand, violently tearing the bark apart.

Lu Shu took a deep breath and took a step forward. The scene in front of him came into view——

The inner cavity was as soft and wet as an animal, filled with pink and scarlet colors. A snow-white rabbit sat on the synapse, crossed its legs, and looked at Lu Shu with a little doubt: "Huh? You are so lucky, you actually picked up Casadia's godhood, and you really broke in, but..."

Its body twisted and it laughed wildly:
“——You are still a step too late! Hahahaha! Still a step too late, a step too late!!!”

The harsh sarcasm pierced Lu Shu's ears.

Lu Shu opened his eyes wide.

The purple-haired young man lay quietly in the soft cavity, the branches piercing his shoulders, arms, legs and lower abdomen. The crystal-colored branches had turned bright red, as if they had absorbed enough blood.

The young man's face was pale, without a trace of blood, as if all his vitality had been drained away. His pupils were sunken in his eye sockets, his golden eyes were empty and lifeless, and even his fingers were skinny.

——He is like a dried-up swallow.

"...Su Mingan?" Lu Shu called out softly, unable to believe it.

The young man did not respond, his eyes remained open and empty, completely unresponsive to the outside world.

“…Su Ming’an!” Lu Shu raised his voice. The laughter in his ears almost drove him crazy.

He still didn't get a response.

Those eyes that were always bright and clear were now empty and withered.

Where did that soul go?

The moment Lu Shu saw the Boss Rabbit, he was filled with panic. He knew that the Boss Rabbit would not appear here for no reason. Every time it came, it was not good. But he never thought that the Boss Rabbit would be so shameless!
Isn't it called "the first player of kisses"?

Didn’t she say in an ambiguous manner that “Tutu loves him very much”?

Is this what love is? Is this what love is? ? ——What on earth is this! ?

Lu Shu chopped with his sword, and the Boss Rabbit twisted its body. Colorful light fell on the World Tree and smashed a big hole.

"Oh my~ Why are you so angry? I just added a little bit to the flames~" Boss Rabbit twisted his body: "But even if you save him, it's useless! You don't still think that he can go home with you! It's impossible! It's impossible for a long time! Hahahaha——"

Lu Shu's pupils shrank.

A thread that had been hanging in his heart for a long time broke quietly and silently.

He rubbed his cracked lips and uttered a word:

"……What do you mean?"

He could barely hear his own voice.

But Boss Rabbit's playful answer was so clear.

"He told you not to lie to him, but he himself is a huge liar! He lied to you and comforted you that you could go home together, but in fact he had already gambled himself away~" Boss Rabbit twisted his body:

"If he loses the bet, he will fall into our hands. Even if he wins, he will come to us to save the fallen Zhai Xing!"

"There's no way he's going home!"

There was a buzzing in Lu Shu's ears.

He opened his mouth and swallowed blood silently.

Boss Rabbit imitated the tone in a pretentious manner:

"After we get back, we're going to travel together. We're going to go to Lin Yin's hometown to see pandas, climb Mount Taihua, go to Noel's hometown to see lavender, and go see Lu Kai aircraft carrier..."

“Ahahahahaha——this is ridiculous. I actually made a wish that I knew would never come true, and I even imagined with you a tomorrow that I could never set foot in!!!”

"He clearly knows this, but he still promises you happiness that doesn't belong to him at all, deceiving you...!!"

"That's enough." Lu Shu said solemnly.

"He's a big liar! Big liar! Big liar hahahahahaha--!!" Boss Rabbit laughed wildly, and there was an inexplicable sadness in his laughter.

“Enough!” Lu Shu shouted.

"What was he thinking when he said these words? He must be looking forward to it with all his heart - ahahaha!" Boss Rabbit laughed and danced with joy.

“Enough!!!” Lu Shu raised his voice.

On his face was an expression of confusion and loneliness. The excessive shock made him forget his anger, and he didn't know how to respond. It seemed that only instinct was left.

Liquid was all over his face, his eyes were red, and he didn't even know when he cried. Maybe it was just the pain brought by the impact of the godhead.

Drops of liquid fell into the mask and smothered on his cheeks, as if no one could see it as long as the mask blocked it.

Between breaths... I feel stuffy, damp, and blocked.

He breathed rapidly, placing his hands on his chest and sucking in the air heavily.

Why would you lie to them?

Why should I deceive them and imagine with them a future that I can never reach? Why should I force myself to smile when I would rather be alone?
Why can't you say it out?
Why walk into the abyss alone?

He suddenly remembered that he had a quiet chat with Su Mingan before entering the eleventh world, because he noticed that Su Mingan had been in a bad mood since returning from the auction.

That day, he knocked gently on Su Mingan's door. Su Mingan was not catching up on his sleep, but sitting in front of the piano, his fingers lightly pressing on the keys.

Hearing the door open, Su Mingan looked at him: "What's wrong?"

Lu Shu stood there and hesitated for a while.

"What kind of bet did you make with the organizer?" Lu Shu asked abruptly.

Su Mingan opened his eyes wide. He had never expected Lu Shu to ask this. He had never mentioned the bet to anyone. He immediately covered up and said, "What bet? What are you talking about?"

Lu Shu confirmed: "You must have made a bet with the organizer."

He really didn't know what Su Mingan talked about with the organizer, but he could guess.

Su Mingan was used to using himself as a bargaining chip, and Lu Shu could keenly sense the organizers' spying on Su Mingan, so Lu Shu would guess it.

"...If I say no now, will you go back to sleep peacefully?" Su Ming'an asked. He was shocked that Lu Shu was the first person to see that he had a bet with the organizer, and even Noel didn't mention it.

"I won't. I know you must have made a bet." Lu Shu said.

Su Mingan took his fingers off the piano.

With a dull sound, he closed the piano cover.

The sound of raindrops pattered against the window glass, casting a shadow between them. One sat on the left side of the window, the other on the right. When thunder flashed, the sudden white lightning was like a descending white line, blocking them.

Half of the white-haired young man's face was also hidden in the black and white flashes, and there was a shadow in his eyes:

"If the end is destined to be a tragedy, I would rather you stay in the dungeon forever, Su Mingan."

Su Mingan looked at him sideways, not understanding the meaning of Lu Shu's words.

"What do you mean?" Su Mingan said, "How can the end be... a tragedy? We will win."

"I mean, your tragedy." Lu Shu said.

Su Mingan narrowed his eyes.

Lu Shu was too perceptive.

For Su Mingan, it was indeed a tragedy no matter what. But for Zhai Xing and his teammates... this would most likely be a happy ending.

Outside the window, the wind was strong and the rain was heavy. The lilies planted by the mantis were swaying in the rain, making a snapping sound.

The slanting rain fell on the piano keys, and Su Ming closed the window.

With a "click", it seemed as if all the silence ended.

Another thunder roared, and a sudden flash of white lightning illuminated the two of them.

"You made a bet with the organizer, right? The bet was whether Zhai Xing would fall. If you win, the organizer will let Zhai Xing go. If you lose, you will be taken away..." Lu Shu whispered.

Su Mingan breathed a sigh of relief.

Lu Shu was very perceptive, but he still failed to guess the correct bet. The price...actually, only Su Mingan had to pay it.

So Lu Shu still thought that as long as they won, everything would be fine.

“Yeah.” Su Ming’an smiled, “You guessed it, Lu Shu.”

He lied again.

...He still became the little liar that he despised the most.

The last bit of moonlight outside the window faded away.

As darkness fell, there was no light in the room.

Those dark eyes were like the faint glow of stars in the night. There wasn't much light, but it was there.

“Su Mingan, if you really can’t win in the end, please don’t let the ending come.” Lu Shu seemed to have noticed something, and suddenly stood up, propped his hands on the table, and raised his voice:

“If all your efforts go to waste and you gain nothing in the end, then you shouldn’t have existed in the first place!”

"If the end is destined to be a tragedy and there is nothing at the end of the road, then don't go on!"

"Su Mingan, do you have a way to prevent the end from coming?"

He moved closer, his white hair fluttering, his eyes fixed on the empty space, as if there were a few butterflies fluttering there. His eyes seemed to be begging, his bloodshot eyes trembling like a string about to break.

Su Mingan did not answer, his eyes looked into the distance.

So that the end will not come?

He can indeed die and rewind the game, making time freeze from then on and no longer move forward, but so what?
It's just confinement, just bondage.

It was just him, who was too stagnant in civilization to let the river come to an end.

The white-haired young man who was close at hand had a serious look in his eyes, and his green eyes seemed to be speaking.

——We just don’t want you to die, Su Mingan.

The only sound in the quiet room is the rain.

A swallow flew past the window, flying high in the rain.

"Do you want me to win or lose?" Su Ming'an looked at Lu Shu steadily and said suddenly.

"I hope you can realize your wish and stay alive." Lu Shu said firmly.

"Does that mean you want me to win?"

"I hope you live."

"Does that mean you want me to win?"

“Alive,” Lu Shu repeated, as if this was the only word left in his mind and he couldn’t hear anything else.

"...alive."

He wanted everyone to be alive.

It was raining heavily outside the window, the moonlight was dim, and the sound of a violin could be heard from afar.

Raindrops pattered on the glass. Su Mingan's eyes trembled, and he patted Lu Shu's shoulder lightly but solemnly. The force was so small that it was almost like brushing away the dust on his shoulder.

It seemed like a century before he slowly spoke:
"... Lu Shu, I will definitely win."

He didn't promise any extra words.

There was no longer that firm promise that they would go home together.

He no longer said confidently that he would not leave.

No longer did he say with a smile that he would survive.

He just said it softly.

——I will win.

But only he knows what winning this bet means.

He knew that if he told the truth, Lu Shu and the others would definitely do something impulsive. So...please let him take advantage of a small loophole in words and let him be cunning for once.

Lu Shu seemed to have finally been forgiven and heaved a sigh of relief. In his eyes, winning the bet meant everyone was happy, which was equivalent to Su Mingan's promise that they would live together.

So he nodded happily and said:

"it is good."

Then we'll wait for you to go home together.

The rain was so heavy that he couldn't see the faint moonlight tonight.

——Naturally, he was unable to see the deep sorrow hidden in Su Mingan’s eyes.

They looked up at the sky, as if they could see the deep starry sky through the rain.

The universe is so deep and vast, with stars connected into lines and beautiful blue and purple nebulae overlapping and intersecting, as if there is endless vastness.

The scale of the universe is so vast that humans occupy only a millisecond in eternity, and the time spent between generations is just a drop of rain falling in the long evolution.

But this drop of rain... spread from under their feet to the whole world.

If the universe is a long and vast concerto, human beings are just one of the short notes. People will still pluck this note to make it soft and beautiful, just like their fragile yet precious nature.

They watched the rain quietly until there was a hurried knock on the door and Lin Yin called them to eat.

"Come for supper, busy people! Luna is cooking today, and it's northern cuisine with unique flavors! There are also cream puddings made by Beiwang himself, and Aini also made grilled fish..."

The girl's voice broke through the darkness of the night, like a warm light.

Su Mingan stood up and said with a smile:
"I won't go. I'll take a nap. You go eat, Lu Shu."

From beginning to end, he only played the first note.

Lu Shu nodded and walked out. Downstairs were Yamada Machi and others. They were holding hot dishes, smiling and waving.

"Come and have a midnight snack!" Isabella waved her hand, holding a homemade mango pastry in her hand.

"If I don't come to eat, I'll be so sleepy..." Beiwang yawned.

"Aini's grilled fish is very delicious, much better than his secret of fire..." Yamada Machiichi smiled quietly, holding a plate of strawberry pudding.

Aini, who was standing nearby, heard this and immediately grabbed Yamada Machiichi, asking him to take back what he said. The two of them hugged each other, and the hall was filled with happy laughter. Everyone's eyes were shining, and the fire was crackling, and the heat was overflowing.

Lu Shu nodded with a short smile on his face. As he turned around and closed the door, Su Mingan's barely audible voice suddenly rang out from the room.

The sound was so quiet that Lu Shu even thought it was an auditory hallucination. He almost had to lean against the door to hear it clearly.

"Give me a little more time..."

Su Mingan's voice was trembling, with a slight tone of crying.

Speaking in scattered, broken, vague words:
"I will definitely."

"We'll find a way to have the best of both worlds..."

"I want to win."

……

"I don't want to die..."

……

After nightfall, it rained heavily.

While Lin Yin was cleaning, she found a dead black swallow in the yard.

The swallow was soaked in too much water and fell to its death in the mud. Its wings were broken and its black eyes were covered with dust, staring blankly at the sky.

She buried it, erected a small mound of earth, and transplanted a newly blooming lily for it.

On the small nameless grave, a pure white lily bloomed beautifully, nourished by the corpses of swallows.

……

——It sways gracefully in the rain, like a spring that has not yet been touched but is particularly beautiful.

……