A deep love: Thousands of stars are not as good as you

An Jinnian, do you know that that day, I chased from the street to the airport, until the security personnel stopped me.That day, I squatted in the waiting hall of the airport and cried for a long time.Everyone was staring at me with pity.Only me, crying like a clown who lost his beloved doll.

　When Xu Yan found me, I took her hand and kept pleading: "Xu Yan, please help me find Jinnian, please. I can't find him, and he won't answer my calls."

　You must have never seen me like that, so humble as dust.

　Even so, I still haven't given up looking for you.But I don't know anything about you, there are so many people, I don't know where to find you, and where did you go.

　During that time, I felt like I lost my soul.I lie in the dormitory every day, unwilling to wake up, and even more afraid of waking up.

　You left quietly, without too many words.Even the news of your departure was learned from others.Jinnian, An Jinnian, I used to think that I was the luckiest person in this world.You gave me a complete dream, but you destroyed it with your own hands.

　For two whole months, I was as decadent as a beggar on the side of the road.Refusing to wake up in a world without you.

Do you know how I survived those two long months?
　It's Xu Yan, she picks the worst words to scold me every day.But I can't bear to abandon me, unlike you who abandon me so easily.

Xu Yan said: "Lin Xi, it's not like you won't see An Jinnian in this life. Why are you making yourself a ghost for him? Don't say that An Jinnian can't see you like this now. , even if he sees it, he doesn't necessarily love you so much, if he really loves him like you do, he won't leave without saying goodbye." Xu Yan's words are like big stones, every sentence knocking on me has already broken me heart of.

　An Jinnian, you know how much courage it took me to admit the fact that you left by yourself.That kind of pain goes deep into the bone marrow.

I always fantasize about you bit by bit, looking forward to meeting you unexpectedly at a certain corner one day, and then telling you, I miss you very much.But then I realized.

　Your appearance is just to tell me that nothing in this world is eternal, including love.

At the end of my life, I started to let go of everything and look for a way out in this confused world.

After graduating from university, I left Jiangzhou and returned to Beijing to start my own life.

As for Xu Yan, she stayed in Jiangzhou to work after graduating from university.

In November 2018, in the middle of winter, at this moment, I am standing on my balcony enjoying the heavy snow.Suddenly your image flashed across my mind.

I pursed my lips as if I saw you standing at the ticket gate of the train station back then.An Jinnian, four years have passed, are you still safe and sound?

Since you left, every day I have been silent in a long, long dream.It seems that only in this way can we say goodbye to the past, say goodbye to you.

I will never be able to suspect that you who are reluctant to let me shed a tear.Will disappear in my world without a trace.